Innocent and Devious
by girlovesmoosey
Summary: Hi. I'm Candy. Candy Rodriguez. but keep it down. i escaped from prison after i was framed for shoplifting. Now I have to disguise as a boy named Justin! and i'm going to a new skool. What could go wrong?
1. A girldude

Everyone likes the new girl, right?

That's what my mother told me.

Untrue.

What if this new girl was framed for something she didn't do? Sent to juvenile hall and now has a reputation. Treated like a freaking delinquent. Then they ran from juvenile hall. My parents know I'm innocent. So I still get to live in my house. But they don't know I ran away- they think I did my time in jail. So they don't know that I have to disguise as a boy to avoid getting caught.

Hi. I'm Candy.

I'm twelve years old and I'm going to a new skool. Yippee…

I started out the morning by turning off my stupid alarm clock. Why me? I knew I would soon get revenge on whoever framed me. But anyway, I got dressed into jeans and a denim jacket along with black boots. I put on a short dark brown wig and brown contacts to cover my bright blue eyes. I could pass as a boy now. No chance of me getting caught. But I'm still scared.

Ah, At least it's Friday. A good day to start skool.

I brushed my teeth and went into the kitchen to make waffles. I packed my stuff in my bag. My iphone, notebooks, pencils, and some more crap.

I left quickly before my parents woke up so they didn't see me dressed as a dude. When I got to skool, I was instructed to go to the front of the class and announce my name…I couldn't tell them I was a guy named 'Candy'.

"I'm Justin." I said in a boyish voice. "I do all my homework and I'm a good student."

My teacher, Ms. Bitters told me to sit down.

I did as I was told.

Sitting next to me, however, was the person who framed me. I could recognize him anywhere. Green skin. Lilac eyes, a maroon outfit. It was him. You see, months ago I was out shopping. I saw him run out with a few things without paying so I stopped him. I turned to see that the police were behind me but when I turned back, the green kid was gone- and he had placed every stolen item in my bag. They had him contacted and he said that I had stolen it…he's evil…

I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned around. A boy with scythe-like hair, a trench coat, black jeans, and boots was behind me.

"Yes?" I asked quietly with no traces of rudeness.

"Hi. I'm Dib. Hey, Justin, do you see that green kid?" he asked me.

"NO." I said sarcastically. "Yes. What about him?"

"His name is Zim. He's an alien. Can't you see! Come over to my house after skool and I'll show you some pictures."

"…sure…" I said as the bell rang for lunch.

I walked to the cafeteria. They had baloney sandwiches…I hate baloney!

I sat down and both Zim and Dib sat next to me.

"Hey, new kid," Zim said, "Just so you know, that kid…Dib…is crazy… whatever he says is not true like things about aliens and stuff…HE LIES!"

"alright…" I said, giving him a strange look.

"That's not true." Dib said when the bell rang. We walked back to class, the teacher assigned homework, gave us a lesson on internal doom and we went home. Dib insisted that I come to his house so I did.

There, I saw a tall man with a large white lab coat and a girl with purple hair, who was playing a gameslave video game.

"Hey, dad." Dib said to the tall man, "This is my new friend, Justin. He's new to skool so I invited him over."

Since when are we friends?

"Oh. Hello." the man said to me, "Why don't you sleep over? Dib's been wanting to have a sleepover."

"Um…I'm not sure I can-"

"Oh, c'mon, Justin! It'll be fun!" Dib said with a smile. I didn't want to be rude…

"Okay…" I sighed. What have I gotten myself into?

Dib grabbed my arm and pulled my into his room. He grabbed like ten pictures.

"See? This is him without his disguise! These are his leaders, the Tallests…his robotic dog…"

Blah, blah, blah…

I was still trying to find out how to get out of sleeping over. I mean, he thinks I'm a boy! And if a girl has a sleepover with a guy…it's just not right…

"I…I HAVE BOWEL PROBLEMS PLEASE SEND ME HOME!" I screamed.

"Liar." Dib said. He could tell I was lying by the look on my face.

I slumped down in the spinning chair that I was sitting in. if I was stuck at a sleepover, why not do something fun?

"Do you have any microwave popcorn?" I asked. He nodded and went into the kitchen to make popcorn.

I could just leave…but that would make him upset…he thinks I'm his friend.

"Here." Dib said, coming back about three minutes later with popcorn and a few movies.

"Would you like to sleep on the floor or up on my bed? I really don't mind the floor." Dib said.

"I-I'll sleep on the floor." I said. He put in the first movie. The grudge 2.

I like scary movies. This one wasn't that scary though.

We had been watching movies for many hours. It was 12am when I finally started to get tired.

"D-dib…I'm kind of tired now…and I don't have extra pajamas." I said.

"Would you like to borrow some of mine? I have a shirt but you may have to sleep in those pants."

"Okay." I said as he handed me a shirt. I started walking to the bathroom.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"The bathroom. To change my shirt." I said.

"We're both guys. You can put it on in here." he said.

Oh boy.

"N-no…I…I'm not comfortable…because…I think I'm fat and I'm embarrassed." I said.

"Um…the first time I saw you, I thought you were anorexic or something. You're thinner than me."

"YOU'RE FAT TOO!"

"Um…okay…you can change in the bathroom if you really want to…" Dib said. I sighed and walked to the bathroom. I took off my jacket and T-shirt and put on the shirt he had given me. I walked out and well…my bra strap was visible!

"A-are you wearing a bra, dude?" Dib asked me.

"N-no."

"Then what's that?"

"An undershirt."

"Why does it have an adjuster?"

"IT JUST DOES!" I screamed, sitting back on the floor to watch the movie that was on. Marley and Me.

"Are you okay?" he asked me. He looked over and saw that I was crying.

"N-no." I said. "I'm not okay."

"Why not? Is it because you don't want to sleep over?"

"No. I don't really care anymore. I'm actually having a good time but…"

"But what?"

"That's the thing…I…I can't tell you."

He gave me a weird look.

"Can I do anything to help?"

"Not at this point." I said with a sob. It was hard to sound like a boy when I was crying.

"Do you want to go home?"

"No. I like it here."

"Can you tell me anything?"

"No. if I told you one thing…you…you'd know the rest." I said. He looked confused.

"Why are you crying?" he asked firmly. I looked at the movie Marley and Me again.

"BECAUSE MARLEY DIED!"

"It's not that sad…" he said.

"YES IT IS!" I said, but this time, I screamed in a high-pitched girly voice.

"Dude…" he said, "Someone needs to go through puberty…"

"No I…I have…it's just that…"

"What?"

I stood up and took off my wig and contacts.

"I'm a girl. My name is Candy. Candy Rodriguez."

And he was speechless.


	2. Too dumb to be real

Dib looked at me in bewilderment. Then he knew exactly who I was.

"You…you're that escaped convict!" Dib exclaimed.

"K-keep it down." I said, "And…I may have escaped but I never committed a crime. I was framed."

"Framed? By who?"

"The green kid. Zim."

"He's an alien, you know."

"Whatever. But I just need you to do something for me…" I said, putting my wig and contacts back on.

"What?" he asked.

"Please…just don't tell a living soul who I am…"

"What's in it for me?" he asked.

Before he could say anything else, I grabbed him and kissed him full on the lips. As this happened, Gaz walked in and saw this and since I was in my boy disguise, everything just looked wrong.

"EW! YOU SICK PEOPLE!"

"I-it's not what it looks like! I-I'm really a girl! No surgery involved!"

"I'm no homophobe but…ew…" she said, throwing a pillow at me. I took off my wig so that she also knew I was a girl.

Then she left.

"Well…since we both hate Zim…want to help me plot something against him?" Dib asked me.

"Uh…okay." I said. Something just didn't feel right and I knew it would bite me in the butt later.

After we had finished watching Marley and Me, I put in the Simpsons movie and was half asleep when Dib started talking again.

"You lied."

"Wha? Lied about what?- besides being a guy?"

"You are wearing a bra." he said. I blushed.

"…yeah…my mom says not to sleep with one on but I don't care…"

"You had me freaked out at first when you were dressed as a dude."

"Why am I talking to you about bras?"

"I don't know."

Then I fell asleep feeling awkward.

When I woke up, Dib was working on something. I didn't know what it was so I asked.

"What are you doing?"

"Using my dad's tools to make a catapult that shoots water at Zim."

"Water? Seriously? That's your plan? Water doesn't hurt! It's just water!"

"Yes. But you see, Zim's alien race is allergic to water." Dib said.

"Oh really?" I asked, even though I didn't believe him.

"Yup." he said.

"You know, I could help you with that. You see, if you make the catapult go 360 degrees at a fast pace, the inertia will keep the water in the catapult and it would make the water hit him…a little harder." I said.

"Oh. I get it." he said, "You're pretty smart."

"Thanks. Are you almost done?"

"Yes." he said "Almost."

"Okay. Do you have any waffles? I'm starving."

"Yeah. They're in the freezer if you want instant waffles."

"Okay." I said, putting on my wig and walking to the kitchen.

Who was there?

Gaz.

"Listen…I know who you are…wait until the police find out about-"

"Please don't tell them! I can't go back to jail!"

"If I don't tell…what's in it for me?" she asked, a devious smile.

I grabbed my backpack and took out a gameslave game card.

"I have the new Pigs of Doom game. Do you want it?" I asked her, waving the expensive and valuable game in her face. She snatched it from me.

"You're a nice boy." she said as I took out some waffles and put them in the toaster. I took out some maple syrup and a plate. After the waffles came out of the toaster, I devoured them and went back to Dib's room where he had just finished the catapult.

"C'mon. we're going to set this up by Zim's house."

"Okay." I said, putting on my shoes and walking with Dib to Zim's house. I had no idea it was so weird looking. But from outside, I heard Zim yelling at someone.

"YOU AGAIN! THERE'S NO WAY I'M GOING BACK! YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!" I heard him yell.

"YOU DESERVE TO WORK FOR ME FOR ALL OF ETERNITY! YOU ALMOST DESTROYED OUR CIVILIZATION AND THIS IS THE PUNISHMENT YOU GET!" I heard someone else yell. I started to walk up to the door and I noticed lawn gnomes walking toward me. So before they could come close enough, I opened the door and found Zim yelling at a guy who was about eight feet tall and like five feet wide! But this was no human- this guy had alien eyes and a fry cook suit. And Zim…he had no hair! He had antennas and big bulgy maroon eyes!

"W-what's going on?" I asked still trying to pull off sounding like a boy.

"Y-you know this boy?" the round guy asked Zim. Zim nodded a little. I decided that before I pulled a small prank on Zim, maybe I should help him.

I ran outside quickly and grabbed the water hose. I turned it on and wet the big roundish dude.

"AHHH! IT BURNS!" he screamed as his skin sizzled.

I looked at his suit and he had a little nametag that said "Sizz-lorr."

Sizz-lorr picked me up as if I were a puppy.

"How would you like a job?"

"I have better things to do." I said. "NOW PUT ME DOWN!"

"I don't like that tone of yours." Sizz-lorr hissed.

"And I don't like you!" I snapped as a small grey and cyan robot walked into the room.

"OOH! COMPANIES!" he shouted.

"GIR! DEFENSIVE MODE!" Zim shouted. The robot, GIR, then ran up and hugged Sizz-lorr.

Sizz-lorr pushed the little robot down, grabbed Zim and me and somehow used jetpacks or something to fly up into an alien ship! I know how crazy this sounds but yeah…

"WHAT IS UP WITH YOU?" I screamed in a girly voice. I saw that I had probably lost my contacts on my way to the ship and my wig was on the floor.

"Y-you're a girl?" Zim asked. I didn't say anything. I just walked up to Sizz-lorr.

"WHAT DO YOU GAIN FROM CAPTURING ME? I…I…"

Don't have to hide my identity anymore. But I still belong on Earth!

"You have no respect towards Irkens and for that, you'll work for me!" Sizz-lorr said.

"YOU'RE CRAZY! DIB DOESN'T RESPECT YOU GUYS EITHER!"

He didn't say anything else. I looked at Zim. HE WAS THE CAUSE OF MY HORRIBLE LIFE!

I pinned him against the wall of the ship.

"I…I HATE YOU! YOU HORRIBLE-"

"You're kind of cute when your angry." he said. I wasn't buying it.

Then we landed on a planet and he took us inside this…fast food restaurant.

"THERE IS NO WAY ON HELLO KITTY LAND I'M WORKING HERE!" I shouted, hoping I was hallucinating and in a hospital.

Just then, two workers grabbed Zim and forced a costume on him. It said, Shlooghorghs, the name of the restaurant.

Then they tried to do the same thing to me. I bit one on the finger the second they put their hands on me! I took the uniform.

"I'll put it on myself." I said, walking to the bathroom and locking the door. I heard a knock when I had just finished putting my head through the uniform that was actually a dress that came with tights and shoes.

"Do you need help?" I heard Zim ask.

"Help? With what?"

"Putting on your uniform?"

I finished putting it on, came out and slapped the back of Zim's head. Then Sizz-lorr handed me a mop.

"Get to work." he said.


	3. no way out!

I sighed and looked at the door. I COOOOOOOULD try to escape… as soon as I took my first step towards the door I felt someone grab my shoulder.

Sizz-lorr.

"One more thing…" he said, pulling out what appeared to be two earrings shaped like…one of them. (The little irken thing with the smiley face) he jabbed both of them into my ears, which had never been pierced. I bit my lip at the excruciating pain this brought me.

"As long as you're in this restaurant, those things won't come off. Try to escape, and they'll electrocute you." He said with an evil smile.

"W-what about Zim?" I asked.

"Same thing. Except his is like a shackle that goes around his leg."

I sighed as he let me go.

"Now that I think of it…you're going to serve the food,…whatever your name is." Sizz-lorr said.

"Candy." I said angrily, getting some weird type of food that was prepared by Zim. I brought it to table seven, where it needed to go.

Two seconds before I was going to give the food to the creatures there, I looked down to see blood dripping on the floor.

_Uh, oh. _I thought. Then I realized that the blood was actually from the food.

"Uh…h-hold on a sec…" I said, taking the plate of…stuff back to the main desk.

"ZIM!" I called. He rushed over.

"Yes?"

"WHY IS THE FOOD ALL…BLOODY? HOW COULD YOU SERVE THIS?"

"It's supposed to be like that. Trust me, those are not meant to be cooked long at all." Zim said.

"You're going to poison people." I said.

"You just don't get it, Justin-"

"Candy! My name is candy!" I yelled.

"Chill out. You see, this is a pretty popular food around here. Now if you want to change the menu, you can talk to Sizz-lorr about that."

"Never mind." I said, taking the food to table seven. I cringed as the people (or…aliens) seemed to enjoy their food. Then I walked to Sizz-lorr who was standing beside me.

"Listen, I don't know what you gain from enslaving Zim and me but I need somewhere to sleep!" I said.

"Sleep? You just started the job!" Sizz-lorr hissed. "You'll sleep when the restaurant closes! At 3am!"

I sighed and brought another plate to another table. I walked over to Zim who was standing by the front desk.

"How do we get out of here?" I asked. He shrugged.

"I WANT TO GO HOME!" I screamed. I looked around to see people staring at me.

"Shut up." Zim said quietly. "Now if you want us to get out of here…" he whispered, "You're going to have to think outside the box. There's always a loophole. Something Sizz-lorr forgets."

"But…what could that…what could that be?"

"I don't know. But if I know one thing about these restraints, it's that they only work with windows, doors, and well, if you break a hole in one of the walls. Anything else, and we're free." Zim whispered. I looked around me. Below me. Above me. No way out…wait…then I saw something…

A tiny air vent.

Better start planning!


	4. work work and more work

I looked around the crowded restaurant. I could almost vomit at the smell of the food everyone seemed to enjoy. But, oh, I would get my victory. For soon, I'd find a way to get through the tiny air vent on the ceiling. Somehow, I'd get us out of here- even if it took a few days. "Hey, Candy," I heard Zim say. I turned around."What?" "Do you mind delivering this to table five?" he asked, holding up a plate of…I don't know what… "Yes I do mind. Do it yourself because I'm thinking." "Thinking of what?" he asked, "How to e-s-c-a-p-" "PEOPLE CAN SPELL, Y'KNOW! And, yes. If only I could buy some time…" I said, saying the last part to myself. I walked over to Sizz-Lorr who just seemed to be monitoring his customers. "PERMISSION TO USE THE BATHROOM, SIZZ-LORR?" I asked firmly…and loudly. "Whatever. But you're going to be the one to clean the toilets." He said.I walked into what I hoped was the girls' bathroom and sat on the sink. Okay, I had time. Now… obviously, the vent was too small to fit through, but it was our only chance. I had to not only find a way out but find a way to escape without Sizz-Lorr going a chance-we're doomed. I'm on a foreign planet and I can't even explore it. We can't leave this place- at least not yet. I walked out of the bathroom and walked right back into the disgusting restaurant. I looked at the clock that said it was twelve thirty. It was really that late?Well, I was tired. I picked up a plate of…something and was GOING to bring it to table five but I sort of…couldn't keep my eyes open any longer and fell to the floor which was probably filthy. I slept there until Zim started kicking me.

"Wake up!" he said, "If Sizz-Lorr sees you asleep on the job, HYOOMAN, we're both in some hot water!" (lol to him water is like acid)

"…Okay…" I said, getting up. I apologized to table five and went to the register.

"I'll just work here from now on." I told Zim. He nodded and began to bring food to the other tables. I realized I had made a mistake because a big line began to form by the register.

"…are you sure you can handle the register?" Zim asked after my constant movement caused me to sweat.

"I'm fine." I lied.

"Okay then." he said as he made delivering food look easy. It's not!…okay but I'm lazy.

Finally, 3am came. The restaurant closed- but we had to stay late to clean up. Too many dishes! SO MUCH GREASE!

"Alright, I know you two probably don't know this but…there are a few rooms attached to the back of this restaurant so you still can't escape. There's a balcony but you can't cross that either. I'll be on my way home. And you, water resistant creature," Sizz-Lorr said, pointing to me, "There's a shower back there."

"Alright." I nodded. I was just tired.

"And I need you guys up by eight. We open at nine thirty." Sizz-Lorr said.

"I want the room attached to the balcony." I said.

"There's only one bedroom."

"WHAT? I'M NOT SLEEPING ANYWHERE NEAR THIS…THIS CREEP!" I said, referring to Zim.

"Hey." he said, "What are you implying, human?"

"You just creep me out." I said then turned back to Sizz-Lorr, "I want to go home."

"Then you should have never offended SIZZ-LORR!" he shouted.

"I'm sorry but I'm not going to let a big round alien dude order me around!" I snapped.

"Round? Are you calling me fat?"

"Maybe I am. Let me go, and I'll stay out of your way for as long as I live."

"No deal." Sizz-Lorr said and handed me a key, "You guys do whatever. I'm going home and don't even THINK about pulling anything funny. I want you both here and in uniform before 9:30! Understand? And there are like two wardrobes full of new clothes. So bye."

After he left, I ran to the back of the restaurant and unlocked the door. There was one big room and some bunk beds and outside, a balcony.

"Okay, Zim. You take a bunk bed. I'm gonna go back out and sleep at table thirteen."

"Um…okay but-"

"I'm gonna take a shower." I said, grabbing some clothes. I took them to the bathroom and are details necessary? Anyway, after my thick, long-like-princess Peach hair was washed, I walked out. (Though my hair is the shade of charcoal.)

And to my surprise, my hair turned purple! I couldn't stop looking in the mirror- I mean it was like a bright violet!

"Zim…do you know anything about shampoo that turns hair…purple?" I asked, finding it a lot easier to run a brush through my hair.

"Um…maybe it was hair dye…" he said from the bedroom, and I could tell he was half asleep.

"Nope. It says, 'ELPRUP REDNOW SHAMPOO'." I said, pronouncing it as best I can.

"Read it backwards. It says "PURPLE WONDER SHAMPOO. Oh my Tallest, you're slow." he said.

"Thanks." I said, "But does it wear off?"

"Nope."

"Okay. G'night," I said, taking a blanket to table thirteen. Only to be woken up by Zim…FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER!"

"It's eight." he said, waking me with a cup of hazelnut coffee on the table.

"I don't…wanna go to skool, daddy," I moaned, closing my eyes.

"Candy, it's time for work."

"NO!"

"HERE COMES SIZZ-LORR!" he shouted.

"EEK! I DESERVE TO LIVE!" I shouted, my eyes wide open. I smacked the back of Zim's haid when I saw him giggle. I took a sip of the coffee, went into the bedroom, grabbed my uniform, and got dressed in the bathroom. I was ready by nine thirty and There came Sizz-Lorr, ready to put his slaves to work.


	5. So strange

I sat at a spinny chair and waited. Then a HUGE group of customers came after about maybe five minutes. I sighed and got to the counter. I banged my head on it a few times then…

There came a spark of CRAZY!

"E-excuse me, can I get some napkins?" someone asked, walking up to me.

"GET 'EM YOURSELF! YOU HAVE FOUR HANDS!" I screamed, and it was true. That thing had four hands.

"Well where are-"

"FIND THEM YOURSELF!"

"CANDY!" I heard Sizz-Lorr screech. He grabbed me and held me in the air by one of my arms which hurt.

"TREAT MY CUSTOMERS WITH RESPECT! THIS IS YOUR FIRST AND FINAL WARNING!" he snapped then put me down.

"MAKE ME!" I screamed, "IF YOU DON'T LIKE HOW I TREAT YOUR CUSTOMERS, DON'T MAKE ME WORK HERE!"

"Nonsense, Candy. You've only started the job and you're going to keep it until the end of the Foodening. But Zim keeps his job here forever."

"Foodening? What is-"

"No time to explain. But it's in two weeks."

"How long does it last?" I asked.

"Twenty years." he said, "All I can say now is that nothing can leave the planet for that long and blah, blah, blah."

"I'LL BE THIRTY TWO BY THEN! I'LL BE OLD!"

"Too bad. Now get to work before I make up my mind to have something horrible done to you."

"You don't scare me." I hissed. He stepped a bit closer to me.

"With that tracking device, I know everything about you. Heck, I can NEARLY read your mind."

"…and…? So what? And you can't know everything about me. I've been protecting my identity for…some time…"

"Well, if I didn't know everything about you, would I know that your real name is actually Candace? Not Candy."

"W-wait…this is a tracking device too? You can find me with this?" (lol Candy looks slow now)

"And I can know where your mind intends you to go, who's near you and what you're wearing."

"W-what? CREEPER!"

"GET BACK TO WORK! THIS IS COMING OUT OF YOUR PAYCHECK!"

"I DON'T GET A PAYCHECK!" I screamed then turned to one customer. A minor who seemed to be a very young child.

"RUN, KID, RUN! OR HE'LL ENSLAVE YOU LIKE THE REST OF US!" I yelled, grabbing the kid's shirt. When Sizz-Lorr looked at me, I released my grip and ran back to the register. Then, the other employees walked in.

"HEY WAIT! HOW COME THEY DON'T COME IN UNTIL TEN FIFTEEN?" I screamed at Sizz-Lorr, "AND THEY LEAVE AT NINE!"

"They're good employees. Unlike you and mister 'tries to demolish the Irken race' over there."

"You Irkens irk me." I said.

"Candy…" Sizz-Lorr said, "Do you know…-"

"THE MUFFIN MAN? YES I DO!"

"…no, Candace. Do you know what I can do to you?"

"Nope. And I don't care."

"EAT THIS!" he said trying to throw a punch. I dodged it and karate flipped him over which was pretty hard.

"Oh, I ate it. And I threw it right back up on you." I said. I didn't think he would try to pull something like that but…I guess for me, that was lucky.

He was just so angry at me and all of this caused a scene. People were staring and Sizz-Lorr was fuming. I quickly ran and hid behind Zim who was about to deliver some food.

"…I want to go home! I want my mommy!"

"A-are you crying?" he asked me as I ducked down and grabbed his legs when I heard Sizz-Lorr coming.

"N-no. No because I don't cry!" I said…which was followed by a sob.

"Candy, I want you to…"

"Apologize?" I asked, sounding nasal.

"HECK NO! RUN, CANDY! YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT!"

I ran between Sizz-Lorrs legs and behind him. I ended up running into some weird room with a huge machine. Sizz-Lorr walked in behind me and he closed and locked the door with a key behind him.

"You…you just sealed your fate, Candace." he hissed. He grabbed me and tied me to a chair.

"THIS SHOULD BE ILLEGAL!" I screeched.

"It is. But not on THIS planet." Sizz-Lorr said.

I felt a horrifying jolt of electricity. I bit my lip and wanted to scream. He could have at least given me a towel to bite on.

"You're free to go." he said, just as the pain had stopped.

"H-home?" I asked.

"No." he said with a laugh, "Back to work. TRUST ME, you'll adapt to this place sooner or later."

_Strange, _I thought, _Why was that necessary? Why didn't he just kill me then and there?_

_By the time I came back out, Zim was just staring at me, a strange look on his face._

"_Candy are you wearing a PAK?" he asked._

"_NO! NOT YET!" _

"…_what?" he asked, confused as to where I was going with this, "T-turn around"_

"_NO! I DON'T TRUST YOU!"_

"_Candy, hear me now, believe me later, I think you're…you're…"_

"_WHAT?" I asked, desperate to know what he knew and I didn't._

"_N-no. Maybe it's the heat. It's hot today." Zim said and began to work again. Was something so strange happening that he couldn't even believe it was true?_


	6. What's wrong with me?

I got back to work and noticed that my stomach didn't feel so good. I sat down. I was just nauseous.

"You look…pale." Zim said, giving me a Pepsi. (Pepsi is known EVERYWHERE!)

"Thanks. But I don't feel too well and I'm pretty tired." I said.

"Well, you'd better hold yourself together and get back to work." Zim said. I nodded and got up. I went behind the counter and took orders and blah. Then out of nowhere, I collapsed to the floor and when I regained consciousness, there was a crowd of people around me asking if I was okay.

"I-I'm fine." I said, my voice weakening. I got up and stumbled over my own feet. I went right back to the counter.

"Candy…you look…green like you're…sick or something." Zim told me. Then I ran my hand through my hair and a lot of it came out.

"W-WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME?" I asked.

"…Candy, maybe you should…go sleep. I'll take over your shift.

"The counter too?"

"MMHMM…bye." he said.

I walked to the back of the restaurant and changed into Pjs. I went to the top bunk and fell asleep there. When I woke, my hair felt short and the front felt longer than the back. I felt two long, curly pieces of hair sticking out at the top and I felt like something was weighing down my back. On the other hand, my vision and hearing felt much better. I got up, went into the bathroom, and looked into the mirror.

I saw two big blue eyes, short purple hair, green skin, no nose or ears, what appeared to be two curly antennas, and a large pink thing on my back. My reaction? I screamed as if I had witnessed a murder.

"What happened?" I heard Zim ask as he walked in. he saw me and he looked at me the same way I had looked at myself in the mirror.

"Just as I suspected." Zim said, "He turned you Irken."

"HOLY POOP! YOU'RE RIGHT!" I shouted, "Now what?"

"Well, maybe you should find a way to become a FILTHY human again."

"NAAAAW!" I said sarcastically, "I just wanna stay like this!"

Zim left the room and I stood there in bewilderment. Why did Sizz-Lorr do this?


	7. A team, just you and me

I decided I'd ask Sizz-Lorr why he had done such a stupid thing. For he would pay…

I walked into the restaurant, still wearing my pajamas. My hair was straight as a line- I hated it! I liked my hair curly!

"SIZZ-LORR!" I shouted. I saw him give me an evil glare. Then it widened into an evil smile.

"What could you possibly want?" he asked. I detected sarcasm.

"TO BE HUMAN AGAIN! AGAIN, WHAT DO YOU GAIN FROM THIS? FREE PIZZA FROM ROUND TABLE? ICE CREAM?"

"Nope." he said, "I have a new slave to work for me. YOU. And, this slave is the same race as me which means I know everything physically and mentally about you"

"Talk about desperate…" I said with a sigh.

"And I'd like to see you TRY to escape." Sizz-Lorr said.

"No. This is…this is getting to repetitive. Like a video game. You know what? Keep me here. Do whatever. If it makes you happy and keeps me out of prison…I'm fine with it. You could kill me if you wanted to." I said with a sigh. Sizz-Lorr saw just how serious I was. Any sympathy for how much I had given up? No. he smiled.

And I just walked away.

When Sizz-Lorr went on his coffee break, Zim walked up to me.

"You…you're really giving up?" he asked.

"Yup," I said, "There's no way I'm going to become human again and we're not going to fit through that vent."

"NO! THAT'S NOT THE CANDY I KNOW! I HAVEN'T GIVEN UP, HUMA-…Candy…" Zim shouted. I looked up at him.

"But if…if we try to find some kind of loophole to get out of here, Sizz-Lorr will find one too." I said, my head down.

"C'mon, you know better than this! Two against one!"

"Aww, Zim, you know we'd make a horrible team." I said.

"I smell negativity." he said.

"HOW? WE DON'T EVEN HAVE NOSES!"

"You've got a point. But we smell through our-"

"POOP! THAT'S OUR PROGRESS IN GETTING OUT OF HERE! WE HAVEN'T GOTTEN ANYWHERE! I'M GOING TO DIE IN THIS PLACE! I'M GOING TO GROW UP HERE! I KNOW IT! I…I…THIS IS HOPELESS!"

"Well…what do you say? A team?"

"I think Dib and me-"

"NONSENSE! WE HATE DIB!" Zim shouted.

"Yeah but I don't-"

"YOU HATE HIM! YOU ARE TO NO DEGREE FOND OF THE DIB!"

"…why would you care?" I asked.

"…because…Irkens hate humans…"

"But I am human…by heart…" I said.

"FOOL! YOU HAVE NO HEART! YOU HAVE A SQUEEDLYSPOOCH!" Zim yelled. I looked around and saw that the whole restaurant was just staring at Zim and me.

"Well…maybe I'm a…rebel." I said and smirked a little.

"A rebel would try and get us out of here." Zim said and smirked at me while my smile went away.

"Zim I-"

He put his hand out.

"A team." he said. I stepped back a little.

"I don't know…"

"Yes you do. In your…squeedlyspooch." he said. I inched my hand forward very slowly.

"I'll give you twenty Earth dollars." Zim said, I put my hand all the way forward and shook his.

"Alrighty then," I said then walked to the back of the restaurant. I sat at the top bunk and started to think again.

We were getting out of this place and with a… "Team"…I was already one step ahead.


	8. OMG

_Think…c'mon, brain! Get to work!_

_Nothing._

_For the love of cheese, I need help! More than Zim! _

_With this thought, I took my phone out of my pocket. No signal- of course. Well, I was in a pickle. And I was hungry. I hadn't realized it, but I hadn't eaten in DAYS! The food I had seen was just so…ew…I could never imagine eating it. But before I knew it, I was in the kitchen._

_Fridge…well, what did I find?_

_Crap. Not literally but…_

"_Zim." I yawned as he put some…thing…in the fryer._

"_What?" he asked._

"_Is there any food here that…won't eat my stomach from the inside?"_

"_Well…"_

"_IS THERE?"_

"_There is something that I guess you'd consider vegetarian on this planet so it couldn't be as bad to you as our meat… but it's been banned from here for awhile…"_

"_Let me guess- because you guys are carnivores. Now GIVE. IT. TO. ME!"_

"_alright but let me warn you…-"_

"_NO! I'M HUNGRY AND I WANT WHATEVER IT IS NOW!" I yelled._

"_Alright. Don't say I didn't warn you." he said, pulling something out of the fridge. I picked it up and took a bite._

_It tasted sort of like pizza… but the aftertaste was HORRIBLE!_

_I choked it down and sat in a chair. Ew._

_Then, when I got off of the chair, it felt…different in some way. I walked by Zim, who looked…taller for some reason but not by much. I saw him snicker._

"_What?" I asked._

"_I knew this would happen. That food…makes you shrink four and a half inches every time you eat it." Zim said._

"_THAT'S SO STUPID! W-WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?"_

"_I tried to…" he said, a smile on his face._

"_NOW I-I'M SHORTER THAN YOU!"_

"_Well…isn't that sad?" Zim said._

"_is there an antidote?"_

"_Not that I know of." Zim said, still laughing._

_Then my brain sparked an idea._

"_Zim." I said, as Sizz-Lorr walked in. I wasn't oblivious to this, I just had to be careful about what I was going to say, "Does it take more effect the more I eat it?"_

"_Actually, it does. Why?" he asked._

"_Because…I have an idea. Come with me." I said, taking him to the back of the restaurant and too the balcony, "If we both eat enough, we can fit through that tiny air vent in the ceiling, get it?"_

"_Clever." Zim said. I smirked._

"_Yes I am." I said. "And we'll be out as soon as possible! Tonight when Sizz-Lorr goes home!"_

"_Keep it down, you idiot!"_

"_I thought you said I was smart." I said._

"_Alright whatever. But you do realize how much of that food you're oing to have to eat right?"_

"_Anything to get home." I said._


	9. FREE!

The day finished faster than I thought it would.

"Alright," Sizz-Lorr said, "I'll be leaving now. HAVE A HORRIBLE NIGHT. Bye."

Then he left. I looked in the fridge and what I found was not good. The shrinky food was gone!

"ZIM! WHERE IS IT?" I asked, my heart pounding as my worry increased.

"I-I DON'T KNOW! MAYBE…" then he made a face as if to say he knew EXACTLY what went on.

"Sizz-Lorr…he must have thrown it out. Well, we're just going to have to make more. I'll get out the stuff to make it and you make sure we have everything we need to get out of here- which isn't much."

With that I walked into the bedroom, grabbed my phone and iPod that were in my pocket when I arrived, and went back to the kitchen (and I took a mini shampoo ).

"Hurry up and make it!" I said. "My antennas are bleeding from these stupid things!" and I was referring to what was a blackish colored blood.

"Alright. I'll put it in the oven." he said and that's what he did, "It takes ten minutes."

"Okay." I said, grabbing and stacking a few chairs by the vent so it would be easier to climb up to.

"Alright," I said, "all we have to do is wait."

Then after about eight more minutes, it was taken out of the oven. I devoured half of it even though it probably gave my tongue third-degree burns. Zim did as well. Then we just …shrank. (the restraints and our clothes shrank as well) We were about the size of two paperclips. We climbed up the chairs and into the vent.

"Alright, Zim. W-wait…" I said as I spotted heat waves, "You left the heater on, you dork!"

"Too late to fix it now. Let's just go before it gets too hot." Zim said. We just kept walking.

Several minutes passed. My ears still bled.

"I-I can't go anymore…" I said as it felt to be AT LEAST 110 degrees.

"We…have to," Zim said short of breath, "We can't turn back…"

"I'm baking in here." I said, "I…don't care what happens to us. Let's stay here."

"You can. I'm going." he said.

"No…don't leave me here. I don't want to be alone."

It didn't get funny until he started dragging me by my arm.

"QUIT IT!" I shouted. I looked ahead and saw city lights of the night.

"WE'RE FREE!" I shouted, running as fast as I could. I opened the vent, jumped out, and landed in a pile of grass. The dew caused by whatever liquid was so could I could just stay there forever. I heard Zim land next to me and he started dragging my arm again. I felt my antennas to see if they were still bleeding and just as I touched them, the earrings came off. Zim saw this and easily took the shackle off his leg.

"YES!" I cheered and started to run. I had no idea where I was going…

But who cared, WE WERE FREE!


	10. betrayal

Well, I was running until I just crashed into someone. Then more people started coming toward me.

Uh-oh Spaghetti-oh's from Chef Boyardee. (Idk where that came from…)

So what did I do?

I ran like Simba in The Lion King when he had to run from that stampede of wildebeests. Guess who was just watching and laughing his stupid green head off?

Zim.

But when I made my way across the people, who were larger than me, I stopped to see a small place that looked like a house. It said, _Witch Doctor._

_Could he help us?_

_I walked inside, Zim, who had been laughing at me because I almost got trampled over, had to cross the people as well. I climbed up on the witch doctor's desk so he could see me. He was an Irken. Nothing special. He didn't look old but he seemed to be reaching his middle-ages._

"_EXCUSE ME! I'M A BILLION MILES AWAY FROM HOME AND I NEED TO GROW BACK TO MY NORMAL SIZE AND GO BACK TO THE RACE OF MY HOME PLANET! PLEASE!" I said, then Zim climbed up, "I'm with her but…I just need to return to my normal size."_

"_Very well. That would be…well, since you guys are in such desperate need of help. It's free."_

"_Thanks," I said, "okay so…now what?"_

"_You two have to wear these." he said, holding up two metal necklace chains that were our height._

"_Why?" I asked._

"_Just trust me." he said._

"_I-I'm allergic to nickel. My skin has a horrible reaction to-"_

"_DO YOU WANT TO RETURN NORMAL AGAIN OR NOT?"_

_I put it on and so did Zim. We both grew and I became human again. It's funny how everything we wear grows with us._

"_THANK YOU!" I screamed. The witch doctor gasped._

"_A HUMAN! I HATE HUMANS! READ THE SIGN IT SAYS NO HUMANS ALLOWED!"_

"_racist." I said under my breath. Only Zim heard me and he started to laugh a little._

"_SECURITY!" he screamed. Two aliens came through a door and Zim and me ran through the exit. The security dudes hit an alarm and ran after us. The whole city could hear the alarm._

"_WHAT DO WE DO?" I asked Zim as we just kept running at full speed._

"_RUN!" "OH IF ONLY I HAD THOUGHT OF THAT!" I screamed sarcastically._

"_ALL I KNOW IS I NEED TO GET BACK TO EARTH TO DESTROY IT!"_

_I stopped running._

"_destroy it?" I asked._

_He stopped too. I knew he had been hiding this._

"_I-"_

"_YOU…YOU HORRIBLE STUPID-"_

"_CANDY, THEY'RE COMING!" he screamed._

"_wait a minute, how come I wasn't caught until now."_

"_In this universe, humans can only be slaves or prisoners NOW RUN!"_

_Before I could respond, the security guards grabbed me._

"_WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?" I screamed as they carried me away._

_Without answering me, Zim just kept running. How did I feel?_

_Betrayed. I could have sworn that by now I could trust him._


	11. Lots of yelling

I struggled as they just lifted me off the ground. I just kicked and screamed.

"I NEED TO GET HOME NOW! I WANT TO GET OFF OF THIS PLANET!" I screamed.

"Sorry," said one guard, "But we have to take you to the town dungeon."

"A dungeon? NO! I-I CAN'T GO!" I said, biting the guys who were holding me up and I started running. They chased after me and after awhile, they caught up to me. They had plasma guns, tasers, and some sort of needles. They grabbed me and one guy pulled out a taser, the other a needle.

"Resist and you'll be sorry, human." one said.

"One word and you'll regret it." said the other.

"YOU CAN'T DO THIS! I HAVE RIGHTS!" I shouted. Then they tased me. I didn't make a sound.

"Anything else you'd like to say?" one dude asked, readying a needle as they carried me.

"YOU CAN'T DO THIS! I NEED TO GO HOME!"

Then they stabbed my neck with a needle. I thought I was going to die because I blacked out.

And guess what?

I woke up dangling by my arms three feet in the air in a dark, motionless dungeon. There was enough light for me to see that I was wearing a white and orange jumpsuit and some boots. The boots were black and…they were kind of cute. There was a small window in the corner. Covered in bars. If I didn't think I was going crazy, I could say I heard a distant, _tap, tap tap…_

Hmm…footsteps?

I heard the gate of my cell open. An alien that I didn't recognize shoved a chocolate donut into my mouth.

"This is your breakfast, lunch, and dinner for three weeks." he said and left. He walked out but I still heard a tapping noise.

Too quiet to be normal footsteps. I fell asleep, hoping to wake up to something better. I woke up to another noise. It sounded like rusty metal. I looked over at the window and saw some bars were bent. Someone must have…opened it for me?

"H-hello?" I asked. I flinched when I saw a familiar face dangle above mine upside down.

Zim.

"You didn't think I'd leave you did you, human?" he asked.

"Well…-"

"Candy, I stole someone's ship. It's just outside. We need to get out of here and fast."

"Alright." I said. "But you need a key to get me out of this thing."

"Okay…"

"I have a bobby pin in my hair. Take it out and I'll tell you how to pick the lock." I said. He took the bobby pin.

"Bend it so it's flat. use the flat side- not the squiggly looking one."

"Kay. Now what?" he asked.

"Put it in the lock and push forward and upward and keep going until it unlocks."

_Click._

_Now I was free._

"_Thank you." I said, picking up the donut I dropped when I was sleeping. I ate it up and climbed up the window. This made an alarm go off so I had to hurry. About ten dudes came running in and we ran to the ship and went inside._

"_start it up," I said._

_He quickly started it and drove up into the air. Soon, I couldn't see the planet anymore and we were on out way to Earth._

"_THANK YOU!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. "YOU'RE AWESOME!"_

"_Really?" he asked, a creepy smile that made mine go away._

"_Well-"_

"_WOAH!" he shouted fixing his eyes on one of the mirrors._

"_What is it?"_

"_THEY HAVE A SHIP! THEY'RE GAINING ON US!"_

"_WELL GO FASTER!" "I CAN'T!"_

"_Then we're doomed." I said as I heard shooting and felt the vibrations of lasers hitting the ship._


	12. It's not over yet!

"WHAT DO WE DO? WE'RE GONNA DIE!" I shouted.

"LISTEN, WE ARE NOT GOING TO DIE!"

Then a missile hit the ship. I walked over to one corner of the ship.

"What are you doing?" Zim asked as I sat down in the fetal position and rocked back and forth.

"there's no place like home. there's no place like home. there's no place like home…" I said repeatedly.

"Candy-"

"TRYNG TO GET A LITTLE BIT TIIIIIPSSSSYYYYYY! TIK TOK ON THE-"

"Wait…maybe this thing has missiles too." Zim said and put the ship on auto pilot while he looked for a button that shot missiles or something.

"Nice knowing you. Goodbye, mommy. Bye, daddy. Bye…Dib." then at the thought of Dib I got up and kicked Zim off of the chair he was sitting on.

"For you, Dib." I said, turning the ship around and facing the enemies. I scanned my eyes across the buttons and found one with a blinking picture of a missile.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Zim screamed.

"NOT DYING!" I said pressing the missile button repeatedly and each time I made a noise like this,

"DADADADADADADADADADA! DIIIIIIEEEEEE!"

Guess which ship crashed. Just a lucky guess.

Theirs did!

"I WIN!" I screamed, standing by the controls awaiting some tickets or a prize.

"Hey-"

"IMA BETTER PILOT THAN YOU! MUAHAHAHAAAA!" I screamed.

"Okay…hold onto something." he said.

"Why?" I asked and with that, I felt the ship speed up and I flew to the back, hitting my head.

"That's…why." he said as We headed towards the asteroid belt.

"WE'RE GONNA DIE!" I screamed as an asteroid hit our ship.

"QUIT SAYING THAT!"

Then the ship went even faster. We flew past Mars and sped towards Earth. We crash-landed on Zim's front lawn.

"YES! I'M HOME! GOODBYE!" I screamed, hugging Zim like an anaconda. (What did you expect from a fan girl?)

"Uh…bye?" he said. I ran over to Dib's house and knocked on the door. Dib answered it.

"What happened to you? You just-"

I cut him off with a hug.

"OHMYGOSH! I'M BACK! I MISSED EARTH SO MUCH!"

"Uh…where did you go?" he asked.

"FOODCOURTIA! AND I WAS CHASED BY ALIENS AND STUCK IN THIS RESTAURANT! AND THEN…THIS WITCH DOCTOR AND I WAS AN ALIEN AND I BET I SOUND CRAZY RIGHT NOW!"

"Um…I've seen crazier. You missed almost two weeks of skool."

"BYE!" I screamed, running towards my house at full speed.


	13. Bailed by mah buddy :D

"MOM! DAD! IMA HO-OME!" I exclaimed, then looked around to see…police…my mom crying oh no…oh crap they must've learned that I escaped.

"I-I'M SORRY! I DIDN'T DO!-" I was cut off when my mom hugged me.

"Where were you?" she asked.

"Uh…I was uh…kidnapped?"

"BY WHO?"

"A…uh…fry cook…but I'm…I'm okay."

"WHO WAS IT? I'LL…I'LL-"

"I'm fine, mom." I said.

"Were you-"

"Nope." I said. The police walked over to me.

"According to our records, you've been bailed so you won't have to spend time in jail."

"Bailed? By who?" I asked.

"They preferred to be left anonymous." the cop said.

"Alright." I said, "I'll be at a…um…friend's house." I said and left.

So…

I walked over to Zim's house..

_Knock, knock_

nothing…

_BANG, BANG-_

"Hey." Zim said answering the door.

"Thank you." I said.

"F-for what?" Zim asked.

"Bailing me out of jail."

"You…you were bailed? I didn't bail you out of jail."

"Then…then who did?" I asked.

"I don't know but obviously, it was someone you know." Zim said.

"Um…I'll be back." I said, running into the direction of Dib's house.

_**BANG, BANG!**_

"You don't have to bang on the door so hard." Dib said, answering the door.

Instead of responding, I hugged him.

"Thank you." I said.

"Wha…oh that…it was nothing really. So you wanna… go out sometime?"

"Go out?" I asked.

"Yeah. I mean obviously, you like me."

"Actually… I'm over you. Sorry." I said, "But we can be friends"

"okay…" he said as I walked back to Zim's house.

**Poor Dib ^^**


	14. Dib's Pov

(I don't normally change the POV but I feel like Dib should share his feelings LOL ^^)

_**DIB'S POV**_

_Okay. Fine. If she doesn't like me, it's her loss, _I thought as I sat on my boring couch. It's just that I was hoping we could be a little more than friends. I mean, I know she would have had the same kindness towards me. I looked at my cell phone. I WANTED to call her. So badly. I kept staring at the phone as if it held my very life. I picked it up and slowly dialed.

6...1...0...1...3...3...7.…8.…9...4... (A/N: those were random numbers.)

"Hello?" she answered.

"Hi." I said.

"Did you…need anything?" she asked.

"No. I just feel like talking." I said.

"Oh. Okay. Do I have a lot of skool work to catch up on?" she asked.

"Yeah. We had quite a few worksheets. What are you doing?"

"I'm…at Zim's house." she said. I was shocked. I thought she hated him! Envy filled me and I didn't speak for awhile.

"Um…hello?" she said after awhile. I hung up after that. I was just…enraged.

I couldn't control myself anymore. I walked over to Zim's house and knocked on the door.

"Hi!" Candy said, opening the door.

"Hey." I said. I glared at Zim.

"Um…Dib," Candy said.

"What?" I asked through clenched teeth.

"We were going to go to the movies. Do you wanna come?" she asked.

"Okay." I said, not wanting to see her disappointed.

"Oh, It'll be so much fun!" she said hugging me.

"I WANNA GO!" Gir screeched, running in with a bag of Takis (Mexican toquito chips. They're like a mix of hot Cheetos and Freetos.).

"Ok." Zim said to Gir. Gir cheered and hugged Zim's legs.

"What movie are we going to see?" I asked.

"Nightmare on Elm Street in 3D." Candy said. (A/N: yes I know it's an old movie now but I like that movie.)

"Okay." I said as we walked out the door. The theatre was only a block and a half away so we got there in no time. We went to the ticket line.

"Four tickets for Nightmare on Elm Street in 3D." Candy said.

"ID please." the woman at the desk said.

"I…uh…left it at home. I'm sorry! My uh…cousins should have reminded me!" she said, punching Zim and me on the shoulder, "But I'm nineteen. I drink a lot of coffee which has really stunted my growth."

"Alright." the woman said, "But don't forget it next time."

We walked inside, got some popcorn and sodas, put a TON of butter and salt on the popcorn, and walked in while the previews were showing. Candy Sat between Zim and me and Gir sat next to Zim. When the movie started, we put on our 3D glasses and watched.

About fifteen minutes into the movie when Freddy killed the first guy, I saw Candy's popcorn fly everywhere. I would have laughed but I sort of flinched at that part too. I wasn't very happy when she held onto Zim in fear though. As a matter of fact, I wanted Freddy Krueger to get out of the movie and kill Zim but that was just…impossible.

**Today's my little bro's bday and we're going to Disneyland ^^**


	15. Lunch, the mall, and an OMG moment

**CANDY'S POV**

Okay. That movie freaked me out.

But as long as my friends were there, it didn't matter. Even Gir was my friend- I can relate to him.

After the movie, we went to Panda Express and ordered Chinese food. That was a good…I want to say lunch but it was 3:45. Now, I really like noodles.

"What do you guys wanna do now? I don't want to go home. Too much drama" I said. (A/N: that's why I spend so much time with my friends.)

"Well, we do have a test tomorrow. I think you should study for it." Zim said.

"What kind of test?" I asked.

"Math." Dib said.

"STUDYING IS FOR LOSERS WITHOUT FRIENDS!" I shouted giving Zim, Dib, and Gir a group hug.

"Smoothies on me!" I said as we walked by a smoothie shop. I got strawberry and banana. A classic.

"Alright," I said, "I want to go to…" I thought for awhile. I would have said the beach but you know…Zim…and water don't mix well.

"The mall?" Dib suggested.

"Okay!" I said as we walked toward the mall.

"Where to first?" I asked aloud.

"I don't know. Why don't you go to Claire's and we'll go to-"

"NO! CLAIRE'S IS FOR GIRLY GIRLS!"

"Okay. Let's go to that skateboard shop that opened not too long ago." Dib said. So we did. And I bought a new skateboard and a beanie that said, "I LOVE NERDS" and it had a picture of Nerds candy on it.

"GAMESTOP!" I shouted, getting out about fifty dollars- I wanted a wii game! Dib got Drawn To Life. (A/N: though I hate that part where Mari betrays her friends) And I got Super Mario Galaxy 2.

"Alright" I said, my voice lazy and meek, "I'm tired. I think I'll call it a day."

**It felt like we were gone for ten minutes. But it WAS pretty fun. I mean, when else do I get to do stuff like that?**

"**My dad will be home any minute. Bye." I said walking towards my house. I had never been alone at night before but it was pretty creepy. Whenever I heard footsteps, I held my bags close to me. Soon, I had become more content. I let down my guard. A mistake.**

**I didn't think much of the noise of footsteps I heard. I bumped into someone and dropped everything I was holding.**

"**I'm sorry." I apologized. The person didn't reply but I heard a noise that sounded like an angry growl.**

**I flashed my cell phone for light and I regretted being vulnerable like this because…**

**I was face-to-face with Sizz-Lorr.**


	16. Room service, please!

"DON'T DO ANYTHING CRAZY!" I shouted as I could feel my still short purple hair blow in the wind.

"Candy, Candy. Don't you know that doing your time is just the right thing?" he asked grabbing me by the arm.

"NO! HELP!" I shouted. No one was around…except for…

Zim and Dib.

They rushed over.

"Do you need help?" Zim asked as Sizz-lorr threw me over his shoulder.

"NAAAAW! I CALLED YOU OVER FOR NO REASON!" I said sarcastically, "Yes"

"I can hear you guys." Sizz-lorr said. I bit his arm, he dropped me, and I ran away grabbing Dib and Zim by the arms because I knew they couldn't run as fast as me- and they run pretty fast.

We kept running and hid inside of an Anchor Blue. It bought us some time.

I looked around for my phone…my god! I MUST HAVE DROPPED IT! (And it was an iPhone- EXPENSIVE!)

"Dib, Zim," I said, "You stay here. I'll ask the manager if I can use a phone."

I went to the front desk.

"Hello. Welcome to Anchor Blue! My name is Arlene. How may I help you?" the woman at the front desk asked.

"May I please use a telephone? It's an emergency!"

"What kind of emergency?" she asked.

"My friends and I are being stalked!"

"Alright." she said, handing me a cell phone that was most likely hers. I dialed my house. Nothing. OMG.

"Thank you." I said, giving the phone back to Arlene. I walked over to Zim and Dib.

"Alright. I guess we're running. I have an idea. Who has money? I'm out." I said.

"I have about eighty dollars in ones." Dib said.

"Alright. Follow me." I said running out. I heard Sizz-Lorr running close behind so I picked up my pace. We ran to the bus stop and just to our luck the bus was there. We ran inside, paid fare and the driver drove off.

"Okay. All we need to do is get as far as possible and find…a place to hide until we can devise a plan to get rid of him for good." I said.

"That's nice," Dib said, "But when do we go HOME? I'm hungry!"

"We'll figure that out. I'm sure there's a Micky D's somewhere."

"McDonalds? I want real food." Dib said.

"We'll figure it out." I said, "We just can't be out looking around past 10:00. You know, curfew."

"Okay," Zim said. The last place the bus stopped was by another shopping center. We got off there and looked around. We walked around until we found a hotel. Three stars.

"Alright," I said, "We can stay here."

We walked in and got a room for a few nights with two beds. We took the elevator there.

"I'll take the floor." I said, "But let's order room service."

"Okay." Dib said, picking up the phone.

I looked over the menu.

"I'll take some Pepsi and the ramen noodles." I said. Dib placed an order for…whatever else and what I wanted.

I turned on the TV and turned to Cartoon Network. Adventure time was on. (A/N: I have to mention that show in so many Ffs because I love to watch it. ALGEBRAIC!)

"Room service!" someone said from outside. I opened the door, paid, and blah, blah, blah.

After we ate, we watched cartoons.

**Dib's POV**

This day was pretty fun. Minus us hiding from a psychopath.

"So what are-"

"OH MY GAWD WE HAVE SKOOL TOMORROW!" Candy exclaimed, "I-I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!"

"Why not?" Zim asked.

"I can't just randomly say I'm Candy when everyone knows me as Justin." she said.

"Well I guess you should get a new wig. You signed into the office as Candy but told everyone else that you were Justin. Summer vacation is in five days so it doesn't matter. You only missed a week or two of skool so you completed most of the 6th grade." I said.

"Okay." she said and calmed down.

It was now 12:00 AM.

We were all still awake- except for the fact that Candy was about to pass out and she could hardly keep her eyes open.

"Coffee." she said, "I need coffee."

"Why don't you just sleep?" Zim asked.

"Why don't you just SHUT UP?"

"what's wrong with you?" I asked.

"I don't wanna go to sleep."

"Why not?" Zim asked.

"B-because if Sizz-Lorr finds us in the middle of the night I don't-"

With that, she fell backwards and went to sleep. It made me wonder what would have happened if we DID give her coffee.

Sad thing is, she fell asleep on the bed I was going to sleep on. Oh well. The floor wasn't so bad.

"G'night." I said, getting a blanket and falling asleep on the floor. Only to be woken up by Candy's voice.

"I…I want to go home. I need a hug." I heard. I got up and saw that she was asleep ans she was still mumbling.

"Don't let me fall asleep. He might come.-"

She was cut off when Zim threw a pillow at her from the other bed.

"SHUT UP!" he yelled. She sat up and smoothed her hair back.

"What's going on? Who are you talking to, Zim?" she asked.

"YOU." he said.

"But…why did you wake me up?"

"You wouldn't shut up! You were talking for like forty five minutes straight!"

"In my…sleep?" she asked.

"Yes in your sleep. It's 3AM and even Irkens need their sleep."

"I'm sorry if I woke you guys." she said.

**Candy's POV**

I didn't fall asleep. I couldn't. I even tried this time.

Oh well. I went into the tiny kitchen and made coffee with the coffee maker.

Hazelnut. I love it.

Now it was 3:15 and I was bored. So, what do people do in the middle of the night when they're bored?

I turned on the TV. Spongebob was on. I heard a loud noise from outside and looked to see Sizz-Lorr, obviously looking for us. I turned on the light and pulled a whistle that was just in my pocket.

_**TWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEET!**_

"OKAY! SIZZ-LORR IS RIGHT OUTSIDE! WE NEED TO KEEP A LOOKOUT AND IF HE GETS UP HERE, WE'RE HIDING!" I shouted. Zim and Dib got up and sat up. Just then, there was a loud knock on the door. I looked through the peephole and saw Sizz-Lorr.

"Hide." I said and hid in the shower. Zim hid behind the kitchen counter and Dib hid under one of the beds.

We're in deep trouble.


	17. How many times does this dude come back?

**Candy's POV- if that wasn't clear**

He began to knock harder and harder. HE KNEW WE WERE HERE!

I began to hear a loud beeping noise. I didn't think much of it though. I heard the door break down. I wasn't going to pay for that. I slumped down in the shower when I heard his wrath. But still, I heard a, _beep, beep, beep. _It wouldn't stop. Then, I heard Sizz-Lorr walk in. I quickly zoomed past him and went under the bed with Dib and Zim who must have discovered how poor his hiding spot was.

Sizz-Lorr came over and reached his hand under the bed like something out of a horror movie. I held on to the leg of the bed. I kept hearing the beeping noise and I started to get a headache.

"Does anyone else hear that?" I asked in a whisper.

"Hear what?" Dib asked.

"That…beeping noise," I said.

"I hear it too." Zim said.

"What do you think it is?" I whispered curiously.

"What is it? I don't hear it." Dib said. Just then, I felt Sizz-Lorr grab my leg.

"_**EEEEEEEEEEK!" I screamed as if I had just seen a gory murder.**_

_**When he pulled me out I stood before him angrily, standing upright.**_

"_**Alright. I'm done. I'm done being pursued. I'm done hiding. What do you want from me?" I asked.**_

"_**Revenge on you and Zim. Especially Zim." Sizz-Lorr said.**_

"_**What did I do wrong? I P.O.'d you. So what? I didn't do any real harm."**_

"_**You…wouldn't understand. It's an Irken thing." Sizz-Lorr said.**_

"_**TO BE A SPAZ?"**_

"_**You're the spaz, Ms. Princess drama queen."**_

"_**You can call me a spaz. Call me a dork. A retard. But nobody I MEAN NOBODY CALLS ME A DRAMA QUEEN!" I shouted, picking up the TV and holding it over my head.**_

"_**Funny." he said. "I can pick up a TV too." he said. I took a deep breath and set the TV down.**_

"_**I can-"**_

"_**You don't think I came here alone, did you? And according to what I know, both of you have killed Irkens."**_

"_**Me?" I asked, "I didn't-"**_

"_**yes you did." Zim said from under the bed. I kicked his leg that was sticking out.**_

"_**W-WHAT IS THAT BEEPING NOISE?" I finally asked, grabbing my head, "MAKE IT STOP!"**_

"_**A tracking device." Sizz-Lorr said, "Zim has one too."**_

"_**And what do you mean by you're not alone?" I asked.**_

"_**Backup." he said, "In my ship."**_

"_**And when did you get the time to put tracking devices on us?" I asked.**_

"_**You sleep, don't you?" he asked. (Shudder)**_

"_**Okay," I said, "So how can we solve this and benefit…all of us?" **_

"_**We don't. You two will work for me for as long as you live."**_

"_**Haven't we been through this?" I asked.**_

"_**Yes. But your mind is so naïve-"**_

"_**DON'T CALL ME NAÏVE!" I exclaimed, throwing the TV at him and breaking it.**_

"_**That is it. I'll kill you right here and now." he said pinning me against the wall. He pulled out a needle.**_

"_**Now tell me, Candy…do you want this to get jammed into your neck or your face?" Sizz-Lorr asked.**_

"_**You can kiss my-"**_

_**STAB**_

_**I started to get dizzy as I felt a needle in my neck. He took it out and I fell to the ground.**_

_**I was conscious at this point- I had to force myself to stay awake.**_

_**Dib and Zim rushed over. Dib held my head up and fanned me with the room service menu while Zim started to fight Sizz-Lorr.**_

"_**Dib…" I asked, my voice weak.**_

"_**What?"**_

"_**Can you…make sure Zim doesn't kill the human race if I don't-"**_

"_**Candy, you're not gonna die! We have to find an antidote! We will!"**_

"_**Dib, look at reality. I just had toxins sent into my blood through my neck." and at that time, I heard a loud thud. I looked over and Sizz-Lorr laid on the ground and Zim was holding a taser. Where did he get that?**_

_**He rushed over and helped Dib carry me by my shoulders. How long would it be until the toxins kicked in? My eternal clock was ticking.**_


	18. Some dude, Keef, I think

Okay. I was just stabbed with a needle and as you've probably guessed, I'm losing a lot of blood. Now, Zim and Dib are carrying me…I don't know where.

"My head is throbbing like a hammer. Where are we going?" I complained.

"To Sizz-Lorr's ship. We have to hurry before he wakes up."

"You mean…you didn't kill him?" I asked, my eyelids getting heavier.

"Right. Sorry I had no time to." Zim said.

"Wait," Dib said, "When did Candy kill any Irkens?"

"On our way back to Earth we were being chased down and we had to kill them." Zim said. When we finally arrived at the ship, Zim pulled out his taser, opened the ship's door, and pointed the taser at everyone.

"OK! EITHER TAKE US TO IRK OR DIE!" Zim yelled.

"Don't threaten them like that." I said.

"Listen, do you want to get to a hospital or not?" Zim asked. I nodded.

"Someone start the ship!" Zim said, banging his hand on the dashboard. The pilot went over, sat down, and started the ship. I pulled out a small pocket mirror to see that I was sweaty and red.

As soon as the ship took of, I started to panic.

"I don't wanna leave Earth again. What if I don't come back? What if I die before we get there?"

"You won't." Zim said.

"Why can't I just go to a hospital on Earth?" I asked.

"You've been poisoned with Irken toxins. You're not going to find much help on Earth." Zim said.

"I feel funny." I said.

"Ok…" Dib said.

"How long will this take?" I asked weakly.

"I don't know." Zim said, "You talk too much."

"I'm sorry."

Well, it took long enough…like an hour. But we landed on a planet. Maybe the size of Earth. We then walked to some weird hospital. I was being carried so I dozed off.

But I was alarmed and awaken when I heard a nurse say, "I'm sorry. We don't have the antidote for that. We can have it shipped here but it may take about an hour from where it is."

"Just have it shipped here." I said weakly.

"Alright, whatever," said the nurse who seemed to really hate her job. I hate when people are like that.

So I sat in a stupid hospital bed. I waited. And waited and waited. Finally, after an hour or so, it was here.

Yay! So, now what? Oh I now have a fear of needles because the antidote hurt like H-E- double BENDY STRAWS! Yup. Not hockey sticks.

Then, we went back to the ship after they paid and whatevs. Something about Irken health insurance sucks!

I felt the same. Weak. And I could barely walk. And I feel bad about starting my sentences with "and". (A/N: yes, my English teacher would h8 me right now)

"C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G! SONG!" I sang. No apparent reason to it. I just did.

Zim seemed annoyed. That made me happy for some weird reason.

Finally, we were back on Earth and Zim spared those dudes' lives. But what about Sizz-Lorr? Where was he? No way I was going back to that hotel or I'd have to pay for the TV that I broke on Sizz-Lorr's head, the blood stains on the floor, and all the other damage. So, no.

"Um, I feel it's best that I stay at my house for- OH MY GOSH! IT'S 7:00! SKOOL STARTS AT EIGHT!" I said, running home and tripping over my weak legs.

Once I got there, I threw on a blue shirt, some skinny jeans, a sweater, and some boots. On my way to skool, I stopped by the store and bought a wig. It was the same cut as my old one but it was black. Fine.

I went to skool and was almost late. I sat in my seat as the lecture started.

"You're doomed. ALL OF YOU! Just like that worm outside!" Ms. Bitters hissed as a bird swooped down and captured a worm.

"YOU'LL ALL HAVE HORRIBLE LIVES! YOU'RE TERRIBLE!" she snapped. I looked over at Dib. I felt bad for telling him I was over him. But…I sort of like…he whose name shall not be mentioned. Not Voldemort. But why would I like someone whose so weird and green? I'm weird. But…

_**RIIIIIIIING!**_

Lunch. Okay, I went to the cafeteria. I got a muffin that was hard as a rock. Oh well.

That's all I got. I sat at a table. And guess who sat next to me?

Zim and Dib. They would not give me breathing space.

"Are you coming over after skool?" Dib asked me. Guess what this pushover said.

"Okay…" I said.

"Can I-"

"BLAAAAAAH!" I shouted. They just stared at me.

"I was just going to ask if I could borrow a straw" Dib said. I stabbed my straw in his tater tots.

"Shut up and drink your tater tots." I said and walked to the reject table. (Best quote of mine!)

I sat with the rejects. Why was I sitting there? Oh yeah, 'cause I needed time alone to know…whatever I wanted to know. Who do I like? Big head? Or green kid?

"You remind me of Justin Bieber, Justin." one of the guy rejects said. I believe his name was Keef. (Uh, oh. Keef.)

"I'm trying to think."

"Can I help-"

"NO!"

"Do you know Zim?" he asked.

"Yes, why?"

"Because he's my bestest friend."

"Does he even know you?"

"YES!" he said, "You're not his friend, are you?"

"Um…yeah…why?" I asked.

"His BESTEST friend?"

"Okay…"

"NO! He's MY bestest friend!" he screamed. I wanted to slap that kid. I knew I could harder than any boy at this skool. But I was taught self control!

"Can you…go away?" I asked.

"Wanna be my bestest friend?" he asked.

"No. No I don't."

"PLEA-"

"SHUT UP!"

"…I like pie." he said, "Do you like video games?"

"Yes. And I can beat you in Halo, Splinter Cell, and Metal Gear Solid. Now please go away."

"WE CAN WALK HOME TOGE-"

"NO!" I screamed, throwing my hard muffin at him.

"THANK YOU!" he screamed and hugged me. I got up and went back to the table with Zim and Dib.

_**sigh**_


	19. LEAVE ME ALONE, STALKING CREEP!

For the rest of lunch, I felt sick; and it was HOT!

"Does anyone else feel hot?" I asked.

"Are you kidding?" Dib asked. "The AC's on and it's freezing!"

"Are you sure?" I asked, cocking my head. Just then, Keef came over and hugged me.

"THIS IS MY NEW BESTEST FRIEND!" he announced. The cafeteria roared with laughter, Zim laughing the hardest.

"Please…go away before I-"

"You're so cool!"

At that, I karate flipped him over the table.

"PWND!" I yelled.

"YAY!" Keef screamed. Funny, considering how hard I threw him, he should have been bawling.

Then the bell rang. Class. Boo!

So…hot…

As I thought that, it began pouring rain.

Hot…

"Doom, doom, doom…" the teacher said. Wow.

"You horrible children have an assignment to write an essay on how we will be doomed eternally."

I raised my hand.

"Can you turn on the AC?"

"It's on. NOW SHUT UP!" the teacher hissed.

After skool, I went to Dib's house like I said I would. I took off my itchy wig. No I did not have lice.

"Oh my god you look terrible!" he said.

"I'm sorry. Is it my hair?" I asked.

"No. You're just red and sweaty. Are you feeling okay?"

"Um yeah. Do you have a toilet I can vomit- oh never mind, it passed."

I kind of wondered how Zim was doing in the rain.

"Um…are you sure you're-"

"Owwwww…my tummy." I said, holding my tummy.

"Do you need anything?"

"no." I said, "But I'm gonna sleep on your couch, m'kay."

I laid down on his couch and used a cushion as a pillow.

ZZZ…

There was a knock at the door that woke me up.

"Dib…someone's at your door."

Dib opened the door.

"Hi." I heard a sort of high-pitched voice say. I jumped up. Had I been mistaken? It was Keef.

I peeked over.

"Is Justin here?"

"Umm…" Dib said and looked over in my direction. I shook my head.

"No."

"Oh. I went to his house and he wasn't there. He wasn't at Zim's house either."

"I don't know where…-"

"Can I come in?" Keef asked. I put my wig on- just in case.

"No I-"

Keef pushed Dib out of the way and walked in.

"Wow! I like your house! It's-"

He froze when he saw me.

"OH! HEY JUSTIN I FOUND YOU!" he screamed and hugged me. I pushed him away.

"Please…leave me alone and go home." I said.

"I'LL BE YOUR BESTEST FRIEND!"

I grabbed my stuff. I nearly fell down from how weak I felt.

"Bye, Dib." I said. Keef followed me out the door.

I walked up to my door, stopped, turned around and faced Keef.

"Keef," I said, "I have to go to MY HOUSE now. You should turn around and go to your house." I said, then held back a sneeze.

"Ok." he said. I walked into my house.

"Hey, mom." I said.

"Are you wearing…a wig?" she asked.

Oh no. I forgot to take it off.

"Yes…it's a trend. Everyone…knows I'm a-"

_**KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK!**_

"_**NO MOM! DON'T OPEN IT!" I said. She opened the door and Keef was there.**_

"_**Hi, Mrs. Rodriguez. I'm Keef. A friend of Justin's.?" he scanned my living room and saw me there.**_

"_**Um…I think you have the wrong house. I don't have a son."**_

"_**Um…that's my uh…nickname," I said to my mom. **_

"_**Oh…come in…Keef." she said. I had a feeling she was catching on to something, and when she catches on to something, she wants me to learn my lesson.**_

"_**Why don't you and JUSTIN go…play video games in HIS room." she said, putting emphasis on my name.**_

"_**COOL!" he said.**_

"_**MOM I-"**_

_**Keef dragged me into my room. The walls were green and my dresser was black. It didn't look like a girl's room. It could be anyone's.**_

"_**Fine," I said, turning on my Xbox 360, "One game of Halo and you're leaving."**_

"_**OKAY!" he exclaimed. I quickly killed the dude he was playing as with a Warthog (Type of vehicle).**_

"_**There. Now leave." I said. He ran out of my room- only to come back seconds later.**_

"_**Your mom told me I can stay for dinner." he said.**_

"_**Oh did she? Hold on, I need to have a word with her." I said, walking to the kitchen where my mom was feasting on dark chocolate.**_

"_**Yes?" she asked.**_

"_**What is wrong with you? You know I don't like that kid. He's a guy! Do you KNOW how awkward I feel?"**_

"_**Why? You're BOTH guys, right, JUSTIN?" My mom asked.**_

"_**Mom, quit acting stupid you know-"**_

"_**Excuse me? I'm the one acting stupid? I know what you're up to. You never did your time in prison, and you know what? Dib bailed you out. Did you ever thank him?"**_

"_**Yes. But-"**_

"_**And why won't you give me details about where you were for the last week and a half?"**_

"_**I'm sorry I…-" I stopped talking and went into a coughing fit.**_

"_**Am I clear on what I expect? You going to prison puts your chances of being a lawyer like you wanted…down the crapper. You're going to have to find some way to make a living because YOU SURE AS HECK aren't going to live with me when you're 25. Don't go marrying some rich dude either, you can't rely on men. You're going to have to make money. And if you want enough to get you through life, you're going to have to start saving now."**_

"_**How?"**_

"_**There are so many ways- but right now, I want you to go in your room and entertain your…guest."**_

"_**This is a punishment isn't it?" I asked. She nodded as I walked into my room. Keef was practicing killing aliens on Halo.**_

"_**What happened?" he asked.**_

"_**Nothing." I said.**_

"_**Oh." he said. I turned off the game and turned the TV to Cartoon Network.**_

_**This day was going to be LONG.**_


	20. A gift?

I looked around. Boring. There was nothing to do.

"Hey, Keef," I said.

"What?"

"There's a squirrel outside…calling for you." I said. Keef hopped out my window and chased a squirrel. I laughed and closed and locked my window. I went and did the same to my front door. I sat down in my bed and fell asleep although it was only about 5:00.

_**KEEF'S POV**_

I saw a nice squirrel and wanted to chase him. So I did. But I bumped into this big, round, and green dude with some scars.

"Do you know…the person who lives here?" he asked me.

"Oh. My bestest friend!" I yelled. He smiled a little and handed me a wrapped box.

"Can you…give this to her. Just say it's from you. It's nothing really."

"OKAY!" I screamed, hopping through a window. ("Justin" 4got to unlock it)

_**CANDY'S POV**_

When I woke up, I ached from head to toe. I looked around and scanned my room. I flinched to see two bulgy eyes in front of mine.

"W-what time is it?" I asked.

"Eight thirty. But I wanted to give you this." Keef said, holding out a wrapped gift.

I sat up and he gave it to me. I opened it and inside was a small black and dark brown puppy.

"Where'd you get this?"

"Some dude gave it to me." he said.

"Works for me!" I said and began playing with my new puppy. Gladly, Keef went home after that and I was still pretty tired.

I went to sleep after setting my new puppy at the bottom of my bed.

Shortly after, I woke up to the dog shuffling around. I got up, picked him up, and set him right next to me.

Suddenly, It just started scratching my face!

"No!" I scolded, pointing my finger at it. The dog bit my finger, making it bleed.

I smacked it on the head and it made a metallic noise. Almost like a metal trash can.

"What the…?" I said and started to bang my fist on it. It felt no pain- this thing was a robot! I picked it up and it bit me but this time, I felt some sort of liquid go into me. I hoped it wasn't venom- but whatever it was, it made me unconscious.

I woke up in a ship, next to Zim and Dib.

"W-WHAT'S GOING ON?" I asked.

"We're being taken to Foodcourtia." Zim sighed.

"NO!" I screamed, "I CAN'T TAKE THIS!" I said going to the front of the ship and slapping Sizz-Lorr across the face.

"WHEN IS THIS GOING TO GET THROUGH YOUR THICK SCULL? I. DO. NOT. LIKE. YOU! I BELONG AT HOME! MY MOM'S GONNA FREAK IF THIS HAPPENS AGAIN!"

Sizz-Lorr laughed, even though my slap made a horrible mark on his face. Actually, he did this evil laugh that lasted so long, it was annoying.

"Silly human, I will be after you for as long as I live." he said.

"WELL THAT WON'T BE VERY LONG!" I shouted, kicking him across the face. The ship swerved to one side and Sizz-Lorr fell off the chair he was sitting on.

He was…ENRAGED!


	21. I make a discovery and PWN Keef

"OH YOU LITTLE NUISANCE!" Sizz-Lorr shouted and began chasing me. I ran around in circles while Dib and Zim watched.

"I'M SORRY!" I exclaimed.

"Really?" Sizz-Lorr asked and stopped running..

"Nope." I said, and ran into another room. (The ship was pretty big.)

Can you guess who I saw there?

Keef.

"K-Keef…WHAT'RE YOU DOING HERE?" I asked, "DID HE CAPTURE YOU TOO?"

"Nope," he said, "I'm his helper. I brought you here." Keef said.

"So you're the reason we're all here?" I asked softly.

"MMHMM!"

"_**AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"**_

_**PUNCH PUNCH KICK**_

"WHAT"_**-PUNCH- **_"IS" _**-SLAP- **_"WRONG WITH YOU?"_**-PUNCH KICK SLAP-**_

"WHAAAAAAAHAAAA!" Keef wailed. (EPIC WIN!)

I ran to the next room and locked the door behind me.

I looked around and I found…

A ray gun? What kind of IDIOT leaves that lying around? Oh yeah, Sizz-Lorr. I picked it up, wondering if he was on the other side of the door and WHO WAS OPORATING THE SHIP?" I barged the door open, slamming the crying Keef into the wall, making him cry more. I felt the ship swerve to the right and then to the left before I made it to the dashboard. Zim and Dib took no action and just watched as I took control of the ship.

I tried to turn it around but…where was Sizz-Lorr?

"ZIM! DIB! TAKE CONTROL I'M GOING TO-"

"We should reach our destinations first and then take the sort of action that you intend." Zim said. Wait a minute…he didn't call me "Human".

"Zim-"

"Let's play poker." Dib said.

"YOU HATE POKER!" I exclaimed to Dib.

"How do you know that?" he asked.

"I stayed the night at your house. You SLEEP TALK!"

"Negative." Dib said.

"What?" I asked, "PEOPLE DON'T TALK LIKE THAT!"

"SHUT UP AND OBEY SIZZ-LORR!" Zim screeched.

I slapped his head and it sounded like when I smacked that… "Puppy."

I banged on Zim and Dib's heads.

_**KLANK KLANK KLAAAANK**_

"_**ROBOTS!" I screamed.**_

"_**She has discovered our identities. Seize her." the Dib-bot said. I started running and soon I had found Keef.**_

"_**ARE YOU A ROBOT TOO?" I asked, banging his head with my fist. It sounded like…human. Oops.**_

"_**WHAAAAAAAA!" Keef wailed. I continued to run through. I went to the back of the ship and found a ticking bomb.**_

_**Five minutes and forty three seconds left. I looked out a window and could see Sizz-Lorr piloting an escape ship about half the size of the one I was in. Zim and Dib must have been in there. And they were headed towards foodcourtia.**_


	22. okay, okay, i rushed a little

_**YO! YOU BETTER READ MAH NEW STORY**__**: Dib, Gaz, and the Little Girl! OR SAY **__**GOODBYE**__** TO THIS STORY! THAT IS ALL. Now keep reading to discover what happens! AND I'M **__**SERIOUS**__**! I WILL **__**STOP**__** THIS STORY IF I DON'T GET ENOUGH REVIEWS! **__**AND MY OTHERS!**_

"No…" I said quietly, taking off my wig that I had almost forgotten about. Keef looked at me strange then went off somewhere to the back of the ship. Then, Sizz-Lorrs face appeared as a projection on the glass.

"GET OFF OF THERE! LEAVE ME ALONE!" I shouted.

"Ah, but I want to watch you die helplessly, Candy. As for your friends, they'll work for me. Would you like to say any last words to them?" he asked, then I saw Zim and Dib tied up. What villain still ties people up?

I put one hand on the microphone, the other on the glass. My head faced down and my eyes looking up.

"Dib, I'm sorry I said I was over you. I'm not. And if it wasn't too late, I would go out with you." I said. Dib smiled.

"Hey, what about me?" Zim asked.

"Zim, you're a dork, but you're my friend and this is all my fault." I said, "but-"

"HEY!" Keef called.

"What?" I asked.

"There's an escape pod back here!" he screamed.

I ran to the back of the ship. The bomb was now at two minutes and there was an escape pod. I hopped in and so did Keef. (aw, can't I just leave him?)

I pressed random buttons and the pod disconnected from the ship. I directed it to attach to the entrance of Sizz-Lorr's ship and we went in that way. I walked in and saw the ship we were previously driving from the window. It exploded. Sizz-Lorr turned around and saw me.

"Okay," I said, "What is with you? YOU SUCK!"

"Funny," Sizz-Lorr said, "You'll just suffer the same fate as your friends. The best part? The foodening is beginning in exactly one hour and twelve minutes. I'll be on vacation by then."

"NO!" I screamed, "you've done it. You've pushed TOO many of my buttons!"

(If this wasn't written by a twelve-year-old, Candy would have said some pretty harsh things right now…elder swear?- Youtube- Potter Puppet Pals: Wizard swears)

"I'm not afraid of you." Sizz-Lorr said. He took a can of something and sprayed it in the air.

"That's right…kill me with your WINDEX!" I shouted, still not knowing what he sprayed. I saw Dib's eyes droop and close while Zim and Sizz-Lorr stayed alert. I began to feel dizzy as I sniffed the air. I blacked out and my eyes closed- luckily, before I could hit the ground.

I woke up in a rope just like Zim and Dib. The ship landed on Foodcourtia.

"Okay," Sizz-Lorr said, untying us, "We'll be going to the restaurant."

We got out and just then, I grabbed Zim and Dib's arms and ran. I stopped a ship, pushed the dude that was driving it out, and let Zim do the driving since I was still a bit dizzy. The ship lifted off the ground as Sizz-Lorr grabbed on to it. Great, he was freakin' weighing us down! (Pfft, who knows what happened to Keef.)

"I'll go get him. You guys stay here." I said, coming out of the sunroof. I peeled Sizz-Lorr's hands off the ship and he fell. Who knew when we'd see him again. I went inside of the ship and closed the sunroof. I sat down and put on a seatbelt.

"So, is what you said…true?" Dib asked. I blushed, smiled, and nodded.

"Why don't we go to the Cheesecake Factory?" I asked. (that's a restaurant)

"Okay." he said. Zim rolled his eyes and continued driving. Was he…jealous?

**To be continued…WHEN YOU REVIEW MY NEW STORY! Btw this doesn't mean she'll be with Dib at the end :3 :1**


	23. The worst date ever!

We arrived home. It was 6Pm.

"So…" I said to Dib.

"Well…I guess dinner's on me." he said.

I looked over and Zim was walking home. We walked to the restaurant and got a table. I ordered a pasta and Dib got the same. I don't really like spaghetti too much but I wanted to try it.

"Well," Dib said as soon as we had gotten our drinks.

"What?" I asked.

"Are you going to order a desert?"

"Maybe." I said.

"oh. I was thinking about the oreo cheesecake."

"Sounds good." I said.

"I'm just glad we went out tonight. I can't stand Zim and I don't know what I would do if you liked him as much as he does you." Dib said.

"Wait," I said, "Zim likes me…and the only reason you're going out with me is because you hate him?"

"Well…sort of…" Dib said.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN? IS THAT THE ONLY REASON YOU LIKE ME?"

"No not…necessarily…" Dib said.

"I like you." I said, "But that'll change if you don't EXPLAIN TO ME RIGHT NOW WHAT YOUR DEAL IS!"

"Well, you're cute…and that's cool although you're aggressive and can be insecure."

"YOU ONLY LIKE ME FOR MY LOOKS?"

"Well, you're strong so I know you've got my back."

"NO, I DON'T! I'M LEAVING!" I exclaimed as the dessert came. I took it and smashed it into Dib's face. I walked away after that. I ran over to Zim's house and knocked on the door.

"Oh. It's you." he said, Gir behind him.

"HELLO THERE!" Gir shouted. I waved at him then turned back to Zim.

"I'm sorry that I hadn't realized that Dib was…such a jerk." I said. Zim's frown turned upside down.

"You like me." he said. I blushed and nodded a little.

"Well, when you spend a few weeks with someone, you REALLY get to know them." I said. Then felt the back of my neck for my tracking device. Although it was painful, I pulled it off.

"Well, I'm going home." I said. I walked home and hopped in the shower. Good gosh, I think I'm fat. I looked down at my leg and saw a mark. It was in black ink. I could tell what it was anywhere. The Irken symbol. What was that doing there?

When I tried to rub it off, nothing happened. I even tried soap. Shampoo? Conditioner? Body wash? PROACTIV SOLUTION?

I walked out in my Pjs. I went to bed and thought, _Wow. Only two days until summer vacation._


	24. make up?

**I shouldn't have watched Cujo last night…(SHUDDERS)**

I slept for maybe five minutes that night. That's it.

It was 5Am. I couldn't go back to sleep. I got up and went to my closet. I picked out some jeans, a jacket, and boots. I couldn't find anything else that would make me look…oh, I don't know- flat-chested.

I put on my wig, made breakfast, and sat down. I looked outside and it was dark. But I began to see a silhouette. It had pointy hair- of course. Ugh, Dib.

I opened the door.

"Yes?" I asked.

"Hey, I wanted to apologize…for yesterday."

"You do realize it's five Am, right?" I said, stepping back and letting him in.

"Yeah, I know. I couldn't sleep." Dib said.

"Oh. Well, I didn't have the best sleep either." I said, "But I guess…I'm sorry too. Sometimes my aggression gets out of hand."

I sat on my couch and watched TV. I flipped through the channels and in the middle of, "Taco bell's new- moo- only on Disney channel- every 28 days, you- facebook- rated PG-13-" (You get the idea), I felt the most horrible migraine. I held my head and didn't want Dib to notice because then, he'd spaz out.

Lol, he did.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

"Fine." I said cringing in pain.

"You don't look fine," Dib said.

Just then, I had to turn the TV off because it felt like the light was melting my head. I walked into the kitchen and looked for Tylenol or something!

Nothing.

I let a few tears roll down my cheeks but wiped them away quickly. I couldn't find any form of medicine so I started walking near the door.

"Where are you going?" Dib asked, every word feeling like a needle to my head.

"To the pharmacy. I just need a few over-the-counter medications." I said.

"Oh. Can I come?" Dib asked.

"Sure." I said, walking out the door. We went to CVS pharmacy and I got some stuff and paid for it. We walked back to my house and it was 6:00. I popped a migraine pill and a few PMS relief pills in my mouth and watered it down.

I felt no better.

I sat and let my mind wander until it was time for skool. My migraine still existed and I had a feeling it would for awhile. I walked to skool with Dib, wondering how he made up with me so fast. HE HAS VOODOO POWERS!

I sat in my seat while Ms. Bitters took role.

Keef was marked absent and I gulped. Not that I cared, but I'd be in huge trouble if fingers pointed at me.

I put my head on the desk and almost screamed during the lecture. I could tell I had a fever and I thought I would heave all over the floor any second.


	25. me is moar sick

**I had a weird dream that my front tooth came out… omg. Yesterday, I had a dream that I went to skool without my clothes then I took a nap and dreamt that my science teacher married the voice in my head…weird…**

I pulled myself through skool that day. Then after skool, I went to Dib's house.

"You don't look so good," he said.

"I'm sorry. Did you want me to come in a tutu?"

"No." he said, "But your face is all red. Do you need water or anything?"

"No," I said, "But my mom is out today and I don't like to be alone"

"Oh." he said. I sat on his couch and took off my horribly itchy wig. This revealed a tangled mess of sweaty purple hair.

"maybe I should just go home" I said, getting up, "I wouldn't want to get you sick."

He tugged on my arm.

"You're not going anywhere in this shape."

"I'M NOT FAT!" I shouted.

"I…I mean you're sick and you can't go home alone. What kind of friend would I be to let that happen?"

I sat back down, took off my shoes, and put my feet on the couch.

"Turn on the TV and I'll stay."

He did just that and Regular Show was on. (A/N: That is the STUPIDEST show but I can't resist watching it. XD)

My eyes felt like they were by a fireplace. Thanks a lot, fever. They began to droop down and before I knew it, I fell asleep. I woke up to a knock on Dib's door. I was nosy so I peeked over and saw Zim. I couldn't quite hear what he was saying- my ears were a little plugged and aching. I got up and walked over.

"Hey," I said, "what's up?"

"Um…Candy," he said, "you haven't been feeling, I don't know, sick, have you?"

He looked back at me and could tell I was.

"Maybe a little. Why?"

"remember the robo-dog that Keef gave you?" he asked.

"Yup. It bit me."

"It gave you a type of venom that slowly eats you away from the inside." he said.

"WHAT?" I asked, "I'M GONNA DIE? NO! I LIKE WAFFLES! THERE MIGHT NOT BE ANY IN HEAVEN!"

"Um…okay…but as long as you weren't branded as Irken property, it can't spread too far."

I lifted up the bottom of my pant leg and there was the Irken symbol that I had discovered in the shower.

"You mean this?" I asked, "I think it got there the same way as the tracking device I had, but I didn't notice it until yesterday."

"Oh my tallest…" Zim said. "Now I have to find a solution. But don't stress too much. It takes about three weeks to kill you and it's only been like three days. "(A/N: I lost track of days and just guessed how long it had been.)

I felt myself get lightheaded and I passed out over the floor.

I woke up back on Dib's couch. It was 7:00 at night. There was a thermometer in my mouth that said I had a fever of 104. The TV was still on and I would give anything to stay on that couch forever. Too bad I couldn't because I had to run to Dib's bathroom and heave. I took a piece of gum from my pocket afterwards and couldn't find my comfort zone again. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't sit comfortably on that couch again. Dib walked in from who knows where.

"Are you feeling any better?" he asked.

"Nope." I said as my migraine started to come back. Just then, Gaz walked in.

"Hey, I thought you two hated each other now! What are you doing in my house?"

"We don't hate each other." I said weakly.

"Gaz, why don't you get a life instead of playing video games and being all hateful?" Dib said.

"Oh yeah? Well, Dib's got a GIIIIRRLFRIEND!" Gaz shouted.

"I guess I do." he said, making my eyes widen.

**REVIEW OR I WILL THROW MY THANKSGIVING TURKEY AT YOU! AND I DON'T CARE- I'M VEGETARIAN!**


	26. girlfriend?

Gaz laughed.

"She probably doesn't even like you!" she said.

"I do." I said, "Why wouldn't I like my boyfriend?"

Gaz walked away.

"That poor thing." she said under her breath.

"You don't…have to be my girlfriend if you don't want to. I mean, after our date the other night, you hated me."

I thought for awhile.

"Okay. Right now, we're just friends. I'll be your girlfriend when I'm…comfortable with it."

"Okay." he agreed.

I wondered how peeved Zim would be if he found out we not only made up but we're even closer.

I sighed, knowing I couldn't miss the first day of skool. I held my forehead as my migraine was just off and on and started to come back again.

"Can you turn off the light?" I asked.

"Sure." he said, turning it off.

I looked over.

"Should I…go home now?" I asked, "It's getting late."

"How's your fever? Is your mom home?"

"I'm not sure but my fever went down to 103." I said.

"Do you want to stay the night here?" he asked.

"Well…last time I only stayed because you thought I was a guy and now…it's kind of awkward."

"Well, Gaz is here and you'll be in the living room."

"Alright," I said, knowing I couldn't go anywhere anyway. My eyes started to droop down and I fell asleep.

The next morning, my fever was still 103. I still dragged myself up and got ready. I used a Colgate Wisp to brush my teeth and waited for Dib. He came out after some time.

"How are you feeling?" he asked.

"B-better." I forced myself to lie.

"Really?" He asked, "Okay then."

We went to skool, went to class, and blah, blah, blah. I ignored every word the teacher said until lunch.

At lunch…I REALLY HAD TO PEE!

"Dib…" I said, tugging on his trench coat, "I really have to pee and I don't know which bathroom to use."

"Um…use the boys' I guess?" he said.

"But I'm a girl and I pee sitting down now please help me before my bladder explodes!"

"Hmm…" he said, "You didn't really think this through on the first day, did you?"

"No." I said, "But tell me what to do!"

"Well, there's a bathroom at the Carl's Jr. across the street. Just take off your wig there." he said. I ran like a cheetah, almost getting hit by a car twice. I went to Carl's Jr. and… well, I don't need to go into detail.

I went back to skool just in time for class. I fell asleep in class and woke up to the bell.

"GOODBYE YOU WORTHLESS STUDENTS!" she exclaimed. I started to walk home with Dib and Zim.

"So…is there an antidote?" I asked Zim.

"Nope. I have to make it. It's more like a virus and can spread to other people, DIB." he said, looking at Dib.

"I don't care," Dib said, "If I get it, I'll suffer the same fate as Candy."

"Well, bye." I said as we reached my house. I went inside and threw myself over my bed. Next to me was a note.

_Dear Candace Rodriguez,_

_Your father and I are traveling the world for our second honeymoon! We'll be gone for a few weeks. You're in charge of the house. There are emergency numbers on the fridge so do not hesitate to call if there's an emergency. Leave the security system on and don't open the door to strangers! Even solicitors._

_Love always, Mommy and daddy_

I sighed and rolled around. I swallowed a throat lozenge. I fell asleep and when I woke up, I had realized that I wouldn't get any better until I had an antidote. With that thought, I held my stomach as it began to hurt. I buried my face in my pillow and bit the pillow hard. Why did they have to leave NOW, when I need them most?

I got up, brushed my hair a little, and went to Zim's house.

"Yeeeees…" he said, answering the door.

"Zim, is there any possible way you can save my life…NOW?" I asked.

"Well, maybe…but I would need a blood sample." he said. I took a step back.

"W-will it hurt?" I asked.

"A lot. But it's worth it."

He grabbed my arm and took me to his secret lab. In there was Gir, playing with a rubber piggy. (A/N: all of my English projects-poems, stories, whatevs, ALL are about Gir)

I sat on a table. Zim grabbed a needle the size of a soda can. (But not as thick)

"EEP!" I screamed, hiding under the table. I was there for maybe five minutes when Gir came down, his eyes red. Before I could see what he was up to, he stabbed me with a needle.

"There." Zim said, "You'll fall asleep in a matter of minutes…or seconds whichever comes first."

My vision slurred and I soon fell asleep on the cold floor. Only to wake up with a bright light in my eyes.

"NO! I'M ALREADY DEAD!" I screamed, then the light was moved and I saw Zim there.

"No, you idiot, I gave you the antidote but you'll still feel sick for another week or so."

I moaned.

"Well…" Zim said.

"Thank you." I said, giving him a big hug.

**Would it hurt to review? Will you EXPLODE if you review? HUHHUHHUH?**


	27. Teh beach XD

"Well, I guess…I should go home," I said.

"Oh, one more thing, the virus isn't gone. Actually, it's still contagious. It's slowly being killed off by your immune system. If you do something stupid like pig out on food or go somewhere too cold or too hot, it won't work."

"So…it might not work?" I asked worriedly.

"It should," Zim said.

"I think I'm gonna go…walk with my legs out the door," I said. So I did. I went home and grabbed my old math, science, and English books. I turned on my fireplace and threw them in. I warmed up with a cup of coffee. I was now very cozy. Until the phone rang.

"I DON'T WANT TO BUY ANYTHING!" I answered.

"Um…It's me." I heard.

"Me who? The guy who wants me to buy stupid air conditioning? I ALREADY HAVE AN AIR CONDITIONE-"

"It's Dib."

"Oh, sorry," I said, "What did you call for?"

"I just wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tomorrow, that is if you're feeling better."

"I am feeling a little better. What did you have in mind?"

"The beach," Dib said.

"Oh." I said, "Well, I DID just get a swimsuit last Christmas, and my parents are out so…I guess I'll come with you."

I could tell Dib turned away from the phone and said, "YES!"

"Do you want me to bring lunch or do you want to go somewhere?"

"We'll go to Island's. On me." Dib said. (A/N: Island's isn't just a California place is it? 'cause I don't recall seeing a single one when I went to Georgia, Tennessee, Arizona, or any other state I visited…Tennessee is by far my fave!)

"Cool." I said, "so I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay, bye." he said and hung up. I ran into my room and threw my teddy bear into the air.

"Mr. Fuzzles, it's true!" I said to, yes, my teddy bear, "I'm going to the beach and- I better do my hair!"

I rushed into my bathroom and plugged in the flat iron.

"La, la, la!" I sang as I pre-brushed it. I put the flat-iron into my hair and pressed it, but the steam gave my scalp a horrible burn.

"Well, that's alright because I like the way it hurts," I sang. (Randomly singing 'love the way you lie' XD)

After I was done, I admired what I had done. My hair was nice and straight. I unplugged the flat-iron and put on my pajamas. I went to sleep and woke up the next morning with a smile.

I picked out a green and black bikini and used a long white t-shirt as a cover-up. I put on some sandals and grabbed a bag with extra clothes and stuff and left. I went to Dib's house.

"Hi." I said, "are you ready?"

"Yup." he said, grabbing a surf board.

"You surf?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said, "I need to get something from my garage, okay?"

"Kay." I said, walking outside. He went to his garage and brought out a black bike, in really good shape.

"I'll trust you to steer." I giggled and somehow got everything to attach to the back of the bike. He sat on the seat and I sat on the back and held onto him and wow, he can ride fast, but I think he was just showing off.

He almost crashed into the bike rack when we got there, and I nearly flew forward. It was pretty funny.

We walked by the water and it felt freezing cold. Then, I remembered what Zim had said. Although it crossed my mind, I didn't care. Dib took his surf board out to the water and I went along.

"You…don't know how to surf, do you?" he asked. I shook my head.

He got on the surf board and pulled me on too. A wave came and we rode on top of it. After it went by, I looked behind me as if the same one would come back. We started to go further away from the shore.

"Are you sure it's a good idea to be riding with an amateur like me?" I asked.

"You'll be fine." he said.

When the next wave came, I literally hopped on Dib's shoulders. He laughed.

"It's not that bad." he said. Then a huge wave came and made me let go of Dib. I fell off the surf board and ended up in the water. I have no idea how long I was under there but I slowly lost consciousness. I woke up surrounded by many people who kept asking if I was okay. I started coughing up water. Then I saw Dib in front of me and hugged him, making the crowd go, "AWWW!"

I grabbed my towel as I shook. The water was cold and sand was in my swimsuit! (A/N: girls, you know how itchy and irritating that can be.)

"How about we get lunch?" Dib asked, helping me up.

"Okay." I said, "We could just call this our first date, okay?"

"AWWWW!" the crowd said.

"COULD YOU GUYS GO AWAY?" I shouted. The crowd left.

We walked by the pier and went to Island's. we got a table, sat down, and blah, blah, blah.

"What are you getting?" I asked.

"Hmm…I don't know yet." he said.

"I think I'll get a teriyaki turkey burger. It sounds good to me." I said, "and I'm craving a raspberry iced tea."

"I'm gonna drink a Pepsi." Dib said. We ordered our drinks when the dude came by.

"Dib," I said, after the guy brought our drinks and left.

"What?" he asked.

"Well," I said, playing with my straw, "You know how I said…I'll be your girlfriend when I'm comfortable with it…? I'm pretty comfortable with that now."

"Okay." he said. I smiled. Then the guy came back and we ordered our food. After talking some more, he brought us our food, we ate, paid, and left. On my way home, I decided to visit Zim.

"Hey." I said when he opened the door.

"Why are you in a bikini and a see-thru white shirt?"

"I went to the beach with Dib today."

"Ugh, what did I tell you about intense temperature?"

"Well, I'm already feeling better." I said, "and I had fun."

"I can't believe you're friends with Dib again after how he made you feel." Zim said.

"We're more than friends. I'm his girlfriend now."

"WHAT?" Zim asked, "AFTER ALL I'VE DONE FOR YOU, YOU CHOSE HIM?"

"Um…you don't have to PMS all over me, Zim. It's just that…I like him a little more. And he's human."

"Oh so that's how it is, Candace?"

"DON'T CALL ME BY THAT NAME!" I exclaimed.

"DO YOU KNOW I'VE SAVED YOUR SORRY BUTT MORE THAN ONCE? AND THIS IS WHAT I GET?" he yelled, stepping a bit closer to me. He pinned me against the wall.

"Hey, what're you-"

"Candy, to tell you the truth, I kinda liked you from day one." he said.

"Kinda? You were like a nonstop flirter."

"And I still do. If I didn't, I wouldn't have SAVED YOUR LIFE!" he yelled. He backed away and let me breathe. I sighed with relief.

"I'm sorry you feel that way. Really, I am." I said. I paused for a bit.

"I know you're sorry." he said with a devious smile.

"Hey, what-"

He cut me off and kissed me on the lips.

"WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?" I screamed, feeling the violence to slap him but not wanting to send him to the hospital.

"Have you been using flavored lip balm?" he asked.

"YES! AND I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW-"

"Here's your gum." he said, pulling spearmint gum from his mouth that used to be mine.

"K-keep it," I said, "I'm…going home. This never happened, okay?"

"But it did, CANDACE." he said, with emphasis on my name. I left with an angry look on my face.

This dude can really push my buttons sometimes…

**REVIEW AND THE EASTER PLATYPUS WILL BRING YOU JOY!**


	28. GUESS WHOOOOOO!

What a sad way to end my day: being peeved.

Then my headache came back…yay.

I went to take a shower…la la la… then there was a knock at my door. I wrapped up in a cozy towel and answered it.

"Oh hi." I said as I saw Dib, "Would you mind coming back later or tomorrow? I'm in the middle of-"

"CANDY! SIZZ-LORR'S BACK! HE TOOK ZIM!"

"oh my god! THAT'S TERRIBLE!"

"C'mon we have to-"

"Can I put on some clothes first? I um…don't feel very comfortable right now…"

"Okay." he said. I went into my room and put on some clothes. I came back out in a hurry.

"Did you see the ship?" I asked, "Where is it?"

"I don't know. I think they left but I was lucky enough to put a tracking device on it."

"How will that help? You don't have a ship…"

"Oh yes I do." Dib said running off. I sighed and followed. We ended up by his house.

"Alright." he said, "This should be safe to ride now that I've reprogrammed it to have NO personality as of now."

"What does that even mean?" I asked as he opened his garage.

"Long story." he said. We got in the ship.

"You…can drive it?" I asked.

"Not very well, but well enough to get us into space. Let's go." he said. I jumped when he started it.

"Are you sure…you can-"

I was cut off when the ship flew into the air and into space.

"Alright, they shouldn't be too far ahead," Dib said. "according to the tracking device at least."

We sped up until we saw a huge ship. We got our ship to connect to the opening and I kicked the door, making it open.

"Ah, Candy," Sizz-Lorr said, "I knew you'd come here. That's why I didn't capture you."

I looked around and saw no sign of Zim.

"Shut up, you freaking creeper. Tell me where Zim is and I'll leave you alone."

"It's not about that, Candy. You're going to planet Ork. Home of the largest prison to exist. I'll be on vacation because I can't go back to Foodcourtia. I escaped the foodening with a teleportation device that I forced the human to make."

"Human? I was on Earth." and at that moment, Keef came from a door.

"Heya-"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!" I screamed, kicking him. He fell to the ground. I then turned back to Sizz-Lorr.

"Where is Zim?" I asked firmly. He put on a devious smile and picked Dib and me up.

"PUT ME DOWN, SHREK!" I commanded. (Ah, movies rock…)

He opened a door that was locked and threw us in. He locked it and laughed, leaving us alone. I looked over and saw Zim and Gir. The room was empty but had a fair amount of light. I sat down and rested my head on my knees.

"I guess this is my fate. Prison. All I'm good for is making lives harder," I said.

"BUT YOU SMELL LIKE CANDY, CANDY!" Gir screeched, forcing a tiny smile on my face. It went away after some time.

"I have to pee." I said, looking around and seeing a toilet somewhere in the corner of the room. "But…I can wait."

"Gosh Candy, your bladder must be the size of a key lime." Zim said.

"Oh, whatever," I said.

"And your stomach is the size of Dib's ENORMOUS HEAD!" Zim said.

"PICKLES!" Gir screamed.

"Can't Sizz-Lorr just give us a break? It's bad enough he made me work for him, but ever since I moved to our city, everything's just been weird." I said.

"Well, since we're here, let's…I dunno…talk…about…stuff…" Dib said.

"Okay…" I said, "Why does this place seem so…eerie?"

"It just does. Gaz is gonna be mad at me for not being home." Dib said.

"I wish I had a sister," I said, "I was supposed to have a twin sister but she died when I was four. I hardly remember her."

"WOAH!" Zim said, "HUMANS CAN DUPLICATE?"

"Um…I guess you can say that," I laughed.

"TWO OF YOU? THAT WOULD SETTLE THE FEUD BETWEEN DIB AND ME!"

"I have to pee," I said, getting up and walking to the toilet, "NOW TURN AROUND! YOU TOO, GIR!"

They actually listened…yay.

After about ten minutes, I felt the ship land and Sizz-Lorr opened the door.

"YOU SUCK!" I shouted.

"whatever." he said, "just get out."

We exited the ship and saw a large planet. And in front of us was a place surrounded by alien security officers.

"NO! I HAVE A LIFE TOO! I WANT TO GO HOME!" I shouted raucously.

Sizz-Lorr left and we were taken inside and put into a cell. Three beds, one toilet.

**REVIEWS MAKE ME HAPPY! Btw this chapter and my next occurred to me in a dream… and Keef will probably work for Sizz-Lorr 4eva but at least he's eager about it XD**


	29. A plan?

**THANKS 4 THE REVIEWS! IM OVER 100!**

I sighed and sat on one of the beds.

"We have to do something…," I said, "But keep it down, we're under surveillance."

After maybe five minutes, they opened the cell.

"It appears-"

"CAN WE GO HOME NOW?" I screamed.

"No…it appears we have to search you guys and get rid of all metal objects and dangerous items."

"This…this isn't a strip-search, is it?" I asked.

"No." the guard sighed and took us into a room. Before anything else happened, a voice went over the intercom.

"ATTENTION!" it said, "WE ARE ONLY ONE NIGHT AWAY FROM KARAOKE NIGHT! THAT'S RIGHT, IN ONE NIGHT KARAOKE NIGHT WILL TAKE PLACE AND ANYONE INTERESTED, MEET UP IN THE LOUNGE IN FIVE MINUTES!"

No thanks.

The alien dude put us through a metal detector. When I went through, it beeped. I looked down and realized my belt had metal studs on it. I sighed and took it off. I went through it and it beeped again.

I took off a metal aglet from my shoe. (A/N: I learned that word from phineas and ferb…)

I went trough again and it was fine. When Gir went through…it beeped.

"Whatever." the guard dude said and let Gir leave. Zim and Dib went…and whatever.

"This isn't so bad…" Dib said when we went back to our cells.

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUGHHHH!" I cried. Literally…"I WANT MY MOMMY!"

"Shut up." Zim said, punching me on the arm. "We'll get…you know where," he said looking at the camera and keeping in mind that it was there.

"How do we get, 'YOU KNOW WHERE'? HUH? A FLYING BURRITO?" I shouted.

"YES!" Gir screamed. I looked around and found what seemed to be a blueprint under one of the beds.

"Look." I whispered. (I think that was the first time I talked quietly)

"The people who were here before us must've used this to get…you know where," I said.

The Top of the paper said, _We left this here for the convenience of the next people to be locked up here this would only work during karaoke night unless you're really good at escaping._

I looked down on the paper and saw a diagram that showed the lounge and it showed clearly that the lounge had a long water pipe that connected to the outside of the jail.

It said on the bottom, _Go behind the stage, not on it- or you'll be in deep trouble._

"This is…genius." Dib said_._

"It is." Zim said.

_"_Wait a minute…" I said, "they don't search you until after you get here so is it possible that…"

I felt under the bed and found a small gun loaded with tranquilizer darts and next to it there were two adrenaline shots, and a slingshot with a few rocks…I didn't understand why that was there.

"Oh, we'll get 'you know where'" I said, "And it'll be easy."

**REVIEW PLZ!**


	30. My epic win!

Whelp…

Two nights later, it was karaoke night. We had the choice to either stay in our cells or watch. We were in our cell getting everything ready.

"Alright," I said, "Do we have everything?"

"Yup." Dib said. We left our cell (They had them all unlocked that night) and decided to go stealthy. We saw the crowded room where most of the people were waiting to watch the show. We didn't want to go backstage but when we tried to go behind it, there were many guards so we had no choice. We went backstage just as one song ended and the curtain opened again with the limelight on all four of us. Then music began to play.

"What do we do?" I whispered.

Do do do do, hey yeah, yeah yeah…

Then I realized…we were in the middle of a caramell dansen… oh no. I began to sway my arms back and forth and so did Zim, Gir and Dib.

_"Women are you ready to join us now?"_ I started, then the rest just followed through.

_"Hands in the air, we will show you how._

_Come and try,_

_Caramell will be your guide (be your guide)_

_So come and move your hips sing_

_**Oa-ah-ah **_

_Look at you two hips do it_

_La-la-la_

_You and me, can sing this melody_

_**Owah-owah-ah-oh **_

_Dance to the beat,_

_Wave your hands together_

_Come feel the heat, forever and forever._

_Listen and Learn_

_It is time for prancing,_

_Now we are here with Caramel Dancing_

_**O-o-owah-owah **_

_**O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh **_

_**O-o-owah-owah **_

_**O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh **_

_From Sweden to Uk, we will bring our song._

_Australia, USA, and you people at Hong Kong_

_They have heard,_

_This means all around the world._

_**O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh **_

_Now come on and move your hips singing_

_**Oa-ah-ah **_

_Look at you two hips do it_

_La-la-la_

_You and me, can sing this melody_

_So come and_

_Dance to the beat_

_Wave your hands together_

_Come feel the heat, forever and forever._

_Listen and Learn_

_It is time for prancing,_

_Now we are here with Caramel Dancing_

_Dance to the beat_

_Wave your hands together_

_Come feel the heat, forever and forever._

_Listen and Learn_

_It is time for prancing,_

_Now we are here with Caramel Dancing_

_**O-o-owah-owah **_

_**O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh **_

_**O-o-owah-owah **_

_**O-o-owah-owah-ah-oh **_

_So come and_

_Dance to the beat_

_Wave your hands together_

_Come feel the heat, forever and forever._

_Listen and Learn_

_It is time for prancing,_

_Now we are here with Caramel Dancing_

_Dance to the beat_

_Wave your hands together_

_Come feel the heat, forever and forever._

_Listen and Learn_

_It is time for prancing,_

_Now we are here with Caramel Dancing!"_

I sighed with relief and everyone cheered. We went into the next room before the lounge. There was no one in it but there were two guards in the lounge.

"Okay," I said, "I know what to do."

"What?" Zim asked.

"Give me the slingshot." I said. He handed it to me and I shot the light out from the room we were in.

"What was that?" one guard asked and they both came out. I quickly hit them both with tranquilizer darts and like magic, they passed out. We went into the lounge and saw a long weird water pipe that led to a high window. We stood on a table to get to it. We hopped up and sort of used it like a monkey bar. We kept going until we reached outside. There was a ladder that led to the roof and we moved it so we could climb it to get outside of the wall. We did just that and we were out.

EPIC WIN!

**REVIEW AND I WILL BAKE COOKIES!**


	31. Teh end, right?

I could feel the wind in my hair. A sweet breeze flew over us during this cold starry night. I scanned my eyes to examine the area and soon saw a police ship. We went inside where the key was still in. A stupid person must have left it there.

I danced with joy and hopped in.

"SHOTGUUUUUUUN!" I sang and went to the front. Dib, Zim, and Gir came in too.

"OMGOMGOMG!" I screamed, "Let's hurry up, we've gotta leave."

"Okay, calm down," Zim said, starting the ship.

"Fine," I said. They ship was pretty big. I went into the back and found a room full of clothes and costumes.

"THIS IS SO COOL!" I screamed. I found something random to put on: the cutest panda bear costume.

Dib, Zim, and Gir just looked at me from head to toe.

"LOOKIT MAH PANDIE TAIL!" I screamed.

"You've got to be kidding," Dib said.

"Wow, Dib," Zim said, "Your girl is DERANGED."

"Wait," Dib said, "I thought you liked her too."

"I do," Zim said, "But I'm starting to think she's a little weird for me."

"Really?" Dib asked.

"OH LIKE YOU AREN'T WEIRD!" I screamed.

"Maybe I am but-"

"WEEEELLLLL, IT'S WAFFLE TIME! IT'S WAFFLE TIME! WON'T YOU EAT SOME WAFFLES OF MINE?" I shouted.

"See what I mean?" Zim asked, "But at the same time…I dig weirdness."

"Can you make up your mind?" Dib asked.

"Okay." Zim said, "I've made my mind."

"Then what did you decide?"

"That I'll tell you when we get back to Earth." He said, continuing to pilot.

"Hey," I asked, "What are our plans after we go home?"

"I DON'T FREAKIN' KNOW SO CAN YOU PLEASE SHUT UP!" Zim screamed.

"Sorry," I said, "Flying makes me crazy."

"We see that, Candy," Zim said.

"CAN I DRIVE?"

"NO!" Zim screamed, "NOT UNLESS YOU WANNA KILL US!"

"Can I at least shoot the ships following us?"

"What do you mean? Zim sees no- OH MY GAWD!"

He looked in the mirror to see about five ships behind us. They started shooting and Zim rapidly pressed random buttons, occasionally hitting the other ships.

"C'MON, ZIM, LET ME-"

"No."

"But I can do this! I did it last time! Don't you remember?"

Zim hesitated.

"Fine," he said, "But if you do anything wrong, human, you bet I'll-"

"DADADADADADADIIIIIEEEEEEE!"

"I REALLY wish she wouldn't do that," Zim said as I got every ship to crash.

"I WIN!" I screamed, and with victory, I pounded my fist on a random button.

"N-NO DON'T TOUCH THAT-"

The ship started to drive at light speed.

When we got to Earth, we crashed on Zim's front lawn.

"Is everybody okay?" Zim asked.

"Unghhhhh." I moaned, holding my head, which had a massive bump on it.

"I'm good," Dib said, getting out of the ship dizzily.

"So, Zim," I said, "What DID you decide? You said you'd tell us when we got back."

"I didn't think we'd make it back," he moaned, "And I said I'd tell DIB-human."

He went over to Dib and whispered something in his ear. Dib laughed.

"Really?" he asked. Zim nodded.

"W-what did he say?" I asked Dib.

"He said I can't tell you," Dib said with a laugh, "But he might tell you when he's ready."

"Well, who's up for Islands?" I asked. Dib, Zim, and Gir all cheered.

Well, what can I say about these past few months? My epic adventures, drama, and that fatty Sizz-Lorr? What about my boyfriend Dib? I've been imprisoned on three different planets and I know Sizz-Lorr's going to come back if there's a sequel, but until then, this is the end and, well…I, the defendant of the jury plead Innocent…and Devious.

_**The end.**_


End file.
